Please Don't Try To Clean Your Vagina With A Cucumber

It has come to our attention that people have been using cucumbers as a way to clean their vaginas. In fact, there are various guides and tutorials on the internet on how exactly to do so — but Jen Gunter, MD, an OB/GYN and a pain medicine physician, says that "if you have a vagina you should definitely not do this."

In a post to her blog, Dr. Gunter wrote that she recently became aware of these tutorials, and "WAS HORRIFIED."

"Apparently some women are peeling cucumbers inserting them vaginally and then twisting them around for up to 20 minutes to refresh or cleanse or flush or something," she wrote.

However, you really don't need to be doing this — your vagina is self-cleansing, for one thing. As Dr. Gunter puts it, "VAGINAS ARE NOT DIRTY. That is in capitals because I am yelling."

Not only that, trying to clean your already-clean vagina can actually cause damage.

"Study after study after study tells us that douches, cleanses, steams, vinegar, ph balancing products, aloe, colloidal silver, garlic or whatever else passing as the vaginal snake oil du jour at best do nothing but have real potential for harming good bacteria and/or disrupting the mucosal surface," she wrote.

The possible damage isn't limited to your vagina — you can also put yourself at risk for, um, "bladder perforation."

"A case report of vaginal and bladder perforation with a cucumber has been described as has a case of a penetrating injury with a cucumber through the vagina into the abdominal cavity," she explained. While this can also happen when someone is trying to stimulate themselves sexually, she wrote, it's also pretty possible to get carried away with a cucumber while "cleaning" and hurt yourself.

The bottom line?

"Keep the cucumbers out of your vaginas ladies, whether for cleaning or masturbation," Dr. Gunter wrote. "Vaginas are a great self-contained ecosystem and do not need any additional support from vaginal vegetables to stay healthy. Anyone who tells you otherwise is misinformed, selling a product, or both. And remember, don’t give opportunistic infections an opportunity is a good motto."