MAFS Episode 6 Recap: Are We All Just Lauren’s Face RN?

It's the end of the weddings (well, mostly) and we've officially entered the chaotic part of Married At First Sight Australia with this episode gracing us with the first dinner party of the season. Let's go!

The episode kicks off with a quick glimpse at how all the couples are settling into their honeymoons and new marriages and honestly, I'm surprised by how things are going for some of them.

The last time we saw Sara and Tim, they were on struggle street after Tim told her that she needed to "relax" (don't we all know not to say this to someone who's angry?). But when we check in with them again, the two are all giddy and have clearly gotten over whatever they were dealing with, at least for now (although I'd probably give it two eps, max).

Meanwhile, Andrea and Richard (who are the heart and soul of this show at the moment) are enjoying the last day of their honeymoon together. (Side note: other couples went to Fiji and these two were relegated to rainy Melbourne?! If I were them, I'd be asking for a damn refund.) Anyway, these two can't keep their hands off each other, and it's making my cold little heart defrost a tiny bit.

Natalie and Collins are still not touching each other and are firmly in the friend zone. Hell, they're even going FISHING. This relationship is so, so not a thing.

Then we're back with Lucinda and Tim, who are dealing with a lot after Tim disclosed the death of his family and his apprehension about being sexually attracted to Lucinda. But thankfully, these two are actually doing a great job, with Tim breaking down his walls and treating Queen Lucinda like the queen she is. I love her. I would do anything for her.

In true MAFS fashion, it's not long before shit starts to hit the fan, with a rumour circulating about a contestant having a partner on the outside. The person at the centre of the rumours? Jack (pretend to be shocked, please). So with all of the contestants conveniently reading the same article that morning, they're soon forced to be in the same room for the first dinner party of the season.

The rumour is this: Jack broke up with his girlfriend and told her he was going overseas for a 'job'. The job is obviously code for going on the show. The women talk a bunch of shit about Jack for a while until he finally arrives, pulling aside Tim (no, not the wholesome one) for a chat, where he calls his ex crazy — the perfect tactic to delegitimise her claims. The whole chat was honestly so concerning and gross that even the experts called out his behaviour. "You blame the woman and call her crazy," expert Alessandra said. It's week two and I can already tell this guy is going to set feminism back by 200 years. Christ.

Soon, everyone is herded to the dining table, but one couple doesn't join: Natalie and Collins, the two bestest best friends that anyone could ever have. After a brief confrontation about Natalie talking about how shitty their honeymoon was (if you don't want her not to talk shit about your honeymoon, maybe hold her hand once in a while, mate), Natalie heads back to the table, clearly having just been crying. While the poor gal is trying not to cry, Collins is chummy as heck with everyone, and honestly, it's giving: UNCOMFY.

Eventually, she leaves the table in tears, and I assume Collins is just pissed because he doesn't get to sip his yummy wine and talk shop with the other contestants. You can really tell that this guy hasn't been in a relationship before.

After a brief chat and a cringey speech from Collins, Natalie decides that she wants to go home, with the two deciding to end their time in the experiment, but not without a weird emotional speech from Collins, which Jayden aptly reads as phony. "Collins is pretending to be upset... but he's not upset," Jayden says. Is he upset about not finding love? Or that his Instagram career is over before it's even begun? I guess we'll never know.

While there are some cast favourites this season (Andrea, Cassandra and Lucinda are my sun, moon and rising signs), an unexpected hero is coming into the mix: Jayden.

While the group mingles and laughs over dinner, this bloke is really reading them all to filth in his confessionals. "Some of the couples were playing it safe tonight," he said. "There's definitely more than meets the eye with the authenticity there tonight... it's not a reflection of what their relationship is actually like."

"A lot of people were holding back and were probably insecure about the negative start of their relationships," he continued. "I was a little bit bored."

So in an effort to spice things up, Jayden addressed the elephant in the room: did Jack break up with his girlfriend to go on the show?

"I've got a disgruntled ex, basically," Jack said (BOOOO!). "It was a very casual but exclusive relationship. She fell a bit harder for me and a bit quicker." Jack then proceeded to say that his ex had a "colourful" past and a bunch of other bullshit, including that he was saying he tried to end the relationship "7 weeks ago" — already well into the experiment.

Honestly, everyone's faces were doing this exact thing as they endured him blabbing on:

I'm honestly really tired of these narratives where women are portrayed as 'crazy' to account for men's shitty behaviour — and I know a lot of other women are, too.

Tori finally breaks her silence on the rumours, saying that "it's fine" and that she's "absolutely happy" with Jack. Girl, please, no. Blink twice if you need help.

At the end of episode six, we have one couple that has called it quits, our resident douchebag of the season, and a couple of people that are cementing themselves as fan favourites (for now).

"I've got a disgruntled ex, basically"

Lucinda and Tim, mainly because Lucinda had no idea who TF Jack was.

Jayden for his apt assessment of his shitty castmate.