I must confess, I am a sucker for new terms coined by TikTokers. Whether it’s a fashion aesthetic buzzword with the syllable ‘core’ thrown on the end, or a wacky beauty hack that has you scratching your head, the video platform provides no shortage of inspiration.
In the sex department, it doesn’t fail to deliver, either. Conversations around consent and sexual education fill in the gaps that our school systems leave wide open, and helpful (and thirsty) TikTokers are eager to share the sex tips they swear by.
We’ve seen this before with the ‘knee thing’ foreplay move and now with a sex position users are dubbing the ‘speed bump’. While the definition of the technique differs according to who you ask, most agree that it refers to heterosexual sex where someone with a vulva lies on their stomach with a pillow underneath their hips while another penetrates them from behind. The name speed ‘bump’ comes from the rise that’s created by the pillow under the person’s pelvis.
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“The speed bump is loved by many, I’ll often hear, ‘it’s the only way that I can cum during (penetrative) sex,” Normal’s sex coach Georgia Grace tells Refinery29 Australia. She explains that using a pillow props one’s pelvis up, in order to stimulate the gspot, aspot and other sensitive areas in the vagina.
“People also love the speed bump for the support… instead of having to stress their muscles and hold [a] shape, a simple pillow can make certain positions more accessible, pleasurable and easier to stay in.”
Over on TikTok, users are being coy about the favoured sex position. “You’ve never been to heaven,” one sound plays under text about the speed bump. “The best sex position?” asks a street interviewer to a pair of women. “Speed bump,” one replies.
@louise_staley Only some people get it #fyp #fypシ ♬ original sound - AngelBae😚
The use of pillows in sex isn't a new concept. Even in solo pleasure, Grace mentions that many have had positive experiences using pillows, even when they didn’t have the vocabulary to verbalise it. “Many people with vulvas have a fond relationship with their pillows, humping their pillows in private being their first intro to pleasure,” she says.
Trying out new sexual acts with your intimate partner can sometimes be awkward to initiate. Grace reassures that it needn’t be, saying that the conversation can start by simply sending them this article or a TikTok and asking for their thoughts.
“Speak to the benefits, try saying something like, ‘I’ve heard using a pillow during sex can be really fun — want to try it sometime?” or "When I masturbate I like to wedge a pillow under my hips — want to do it together?,” Grace suggests.
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Like most things in the bedroom, practice makes progress. Perhaps dip your toes in the water by organising a ‘practice and play session,’ Grace recommends. “‘Practice' [is] time [you] try it outside of a sexual context, maybe you start with having your partner's weight on your body with a pillow wedged between the bed and your hips, asking them to kiss your neck or stimulate other sensitive areas. Then when you feel ready, explore this new position. Check in asking things "Like 'what would make this even better?’”.
As with any trend (sex-related or not), take a discerning approach to it. What works for one person (or in this case, a large sector of TikTok), doesn't mean it’ll work for you. If you’re curious, a pillow might just be the sex companion you didn't know you needed.
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