The Real Truth Behind Sex Myths

Skip navigation!

Begin Slideshow

Photographed by Daantje Bons

If sex were a board game, the how-to handbook would be some five billion pages long — with different rules dictated by and for each individual player, and a new set of rules each round. Good luck.

Despite the bevy of "do this, not that" sex-advice pieces out there, it's safe to say that some things society has taught us are just plain wrong. Ahead, Emily Nagoski, author of the book Come As You Are, squashes some age-old myths about getting it on.

Read these stories next:

The Vaginal Tightness Myth Is Damaging & Dangerous

HPV Myths Are Dangerous, Especially For LGBTQ+ People

12 Tips For Your First Time Having Sex

Want more? Get Refinery29 Australia’s best stories delivered to your inbox each week. Sign up here!

More from Sex & Relationships

What Does It Mean To Be Heteroflexible?

We use a lot of different words to describe people in the LGBTQIA+ community. So many, in fact, that the whole acronym (LGBTQQIP2SAA…) has been nickn

by Kasandra Brabaw

How Long Should You Wait To Start Following A Date On Social Media?

My girlfriend and I had been hooking up (but not technically dating) for about two months before I started following her on Twitter. I had read all of her

by Kasandra Brabaw

My “Perfect” Boyfriend Started Choking Me During Sex

Content warning: This article discusses sexual assault and domestic abuse in a way that may be distressing to some readers. My ex-boyfriend was a dream.

How To Fulfil All Your Sexual Fantasies — With Just One Person

by Sophie Saint Thomas

Everything You Need To Know About Fisting

People can be squeamish about putting big things inside of their vaginas or anuses, and rightfully so. The idea of putting a giant dildo, a big penis, or e

by Sophie Saint Thomas

10 Tips For A Sexy & Drama-Free Threesome

by Sophie Saint Thomas

How I Got Back Into The Dating Game After A Long Hiatus

by Maria Del Russo

69 Dirty Things To Whisper In Your Partner’s Ear

by Kasandra Brabaw

Why It’s So Easy To Get Attached Before Meeting People IRL

Whether you’re new to online dating or a seasoned pro at swiping, chances are you’ve fallen into what I like to call the “haze.” Th

by Maria Del Russo

I’m A Straight Black Woman Dating A Woman & Labels Are Complicated

It’s not that deep. That’s what I tell myself whenever my pen hesitates over boxes on a form, under the ‘sexual orientation’ section. It’s

Relationship Advice

What To Say When You Run Into An Old Friend — Besides, “We Should...

When you run into a friend whom you haven’t seen in a while, sometimes the only question you can manage to spit out is, “What are you up to the

Why You Always Overshare About Your Sex Life With Your Friends

When you’re hanging out with your friends, you can go from casually chatting about the weather to delivering a monologue about your last sexual encou