The exact relationship status of Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna was up in the air before today. After their huge December blow-up, there were some signs of reconciliation, or at least cordiality, between the two of them — a couple of endearing Instagram posts and a trip to Lego Land among them. However, it is safe to say that as of today they are officially off. According to Rob’s Instagram, Chyna sent him a video of herself in bed with another man. He claims this footage was sent out of spite, just a day after he bought her some jewellery. You can get into the specifics here.
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I get it: seeing the person you love with someone else is hard. It’s heartbreaking and sometimes embarrassing. And while there is certainly no right way to respond to such a betrayal, there are definitely some wrong ways to do it. What Rob did crossed the line.
He started posting photos of Chyna’s nude body. I shouldn’t need to clarify this in 2017, but this is a form of sexual violence. When you use sexual exploitation as a reaction to a woman hurting your feelings, it is sexual violence. Releasing nude photographs and videos of someone’s body without their consent is sexual violence. Despite this, it’s still an all-too-common practice that is, in my opinion, linked to a special brand of fragile masculinity and toxic rape culture.
The idea that women deserve whatever happens to them if they don’t acquiesce to the demands of men’s feelings and egos is unacceptable. When street harassment turns violent, people insist that the woman should have been nicer or dressed differently. If she is killed by her boyfriend, she should have left. If her nudes are leaked online, she should have never sent them in the first place, or agitated her scorned lover. That women’s bodies suddenly become disposable or collateral damage in love and war is a byproduct of our pervasive rape culture.
While I think the idea that Blac Chyna is a gold-digger who wanted nothing but fame and fortune from Rob is invalid, I can get behind the theory that their relationship was motivated by revenge and pettiness — and for what it’s worth, the revenge plot was executed flawlessly. But hurting someone’s feelings simply doesn’t compare or warrant this kind of behaviour.