I Tried This Best-Selling Ball Trimmer & My Vagina Loved It

My underwear gets so swampy in the summer, a real estate agent could sell a pair to Shrek. The culprit? Nature's thick, coarse private-part wig and the bane of my existence: pubes. I don't condone pube shaming, nor do I think they're dirty. It just so happens that the luscious, beautifully dense afro that sprouts from my scalp also engulfs my entire mons pubis and — despite endless shaving, waxing, sugaring, and suffering — speedily rises like a phoenix from the ashes every time I banish it for summer. So imagine my intrigue when I got wind of a ball trimmer (yes, an electronic depilatory device designed for use on the scrotum) from the "below-the-waist" grooming brand Meridian that labia-owners swear by for seamless hair removal. Needless to say, I had to try.

A few facts about The Trimmer: it's waterproof, rechargeable, offers up to 90 minutes of buzz time per charge, and comes in a trendy sage green colour way that matches my Always Pan. A few questions I had about The Trimmer: does it give a close shave? Will my skin break out in bumps within 24 hours of use? Is it truly mons-pubis-friendly? Well, I finally mowed my lawn and all shall be revealed in my detailed, somewhat comical review, below.

As an electric trimmer novice, I did some research. I deduced that the average groin groomer lands anywhere between £30 to over £100, and the ones worth your time are waterproof, rechargeable, easy to manoeuvre, and come with some helpful accessories. Not only that, but many brands boast some form of skin-protecting technology that prevents nicks, bumps, and guarantees hygienic safety. Meridian's £62 trimmer checks all of these boxes — mine came charged in mint condition and was accompanied by two adjustable guide combs, a cleaning brush, and a USB charger. As for the guarantees, per Meridian's on-site description, the gadget's ceramic blades should "[handle] coarse and curly hair without painful nicks and pulling," while the adjustable combs ensure you achieve "your perfect length."

In terms of feedback, the trimmer reigns supreme with a 4.7 out of 5 star rating and 320 reviews. One customer, Yazan A., put it simply: "It is as expected. So happy to have it." Another on-site reviewer, Kalene B., also gave her trimmer five stars and rejoiced, "It works for women too!" The few unhappy buyers warn the public of not-so-close trims and inconvenient charging, and one even mentioned "it's not a good trimmer for women." Oh, really? I decided to evaluate these opposing theories and give the trimmer a go.

TL;DR it worked.

I can't show you my real results (I did shave my arm for journalistic purposes), but I can give you a worthy testimonial starting with my hair removal history. I prefer to get Brazilian waxes as it completely eradicates my down-there hair for a few weeks and feels the breeziest. When my rent takes financial priority, I'll trim with some scissors and then do as best as I can with a razor. The common denominator here is extreme measures. I never found a happy medium with my follicles until The Trimmer entered the building — specifically, my bathroom.

On a smoothness scale of one (dull razor blade) to 10 (Brazilian wax), this trimmer gets a seven. Are trimmers supposed to provide a Brazilian or brand-new, razor-level shave? I know not. But I do know that Meridian's poster child provides a level of ease and leaves minuscule hairs behind that are SOFT. My full bush was gone in about six minutes and there were no nicks, prickly short stems, or unevenness. Just effortless skin. And although I was hesitant, I even successfully went in between the labia majora (or, as most of us call them, the lips).

We all know that the real trial of hair-removal success is the test of time. I monitored my area throughout the standard 24-hour time slot, and to my surprise, nary an itch nor bump was found. I would assume it's because of the nearness of the shave as opposed to the close, but invasive skin-to-skin contact.

Personally, this will be my summer saving grace. I reminisce on all those times I frantically shaved my bikini line before an impromptu beach trip or uncomfortably laid spread eagle while chatting with my waxing specialist about my day. Those bouts of discomfort will be no longer. I highly recommend this specifically to vagina-havers who don't like sparkly bald genitals — the Meridian Trimmer provides the happiest of hair mediums and truly keeps things under control (don't buy this if you want Brazilian wax level shaves).

So, apologies to Shrek: my summer undies will no longer be on the swamp housing market. He can blame it on The Trimmer.