The OG Sex Toy Has Had An Upgrade & You Can Leave It In Plain Sight

The oldest known sex toys date to around 28,000 BC, created from carved and polished rock. These days, of course, we're much more fortunate to have access to soft, safe, silicone wands and vibrators. Nevertheless, our earliest attempts at masturbation channelled our ancestors' enterprising spirit, laying our hands on anything we could find that might get us off. 

Before we had the money, the confidence or the vast array of sex toys on websites such as Lovehoney, Lelo and Ann Summers, it was the good ol’ shower head that saw we were sexually satisfied. Quick and quiet, for many of us it was our first experience of self-pleasure. And while we've since moved on to flashier, purpose-built clit stimulators, Womanizer is making a case for its comeback — and it’s sure to get you wet.

At first glance, you’d easily mistake this for your run-of-the-mill shower head — I've tested countless sex toys and I didn’t clock it when I walked into the changing rooms at the spa-held launch event. Available in silver, black or white, it’s subtle and sleek and screws onto your shower pipe like any basic model. The only thing that might give it away is the discreet 'W' (for Womanizer) embossed on the top (though it would take a housemate with an eagle eye and knowledge of the brand to spot it, so you should be in good company). 

As a shower head alone, I’d give it full marks. It transformed hard water into a super soft spritz that was much gentler on my skin and hair than my old model yet strong enough to rinse away any product. Remember those jungle-set shampoo adverts from back in the day? That’s the vibe, creating a misty, steamy atmosphere in more ways than one. But this isn’t any old shower head, it’s a *spicy* shower head, so let's get onto the good part. 

Just under the jets is a large round button that transforms this shower head into a serious sex toy. Press once for the 'pleasure whirl', a three-jet, focused shot of water, and twice for the 'pleasure jet', an intense shot of jets no bigger than a pound coin. To tailor the pressure, there’s a sliding button on the handle that takes it from nice and gentle to fast and strong, just like any other vibrator. 

The 'pleasure whirl' is what got me there. If you get the angle right, it can pinpoint a particular spot — and once you find the perfect place, be prepared to come. It’s not quite as fast as some of my favourite toys (the Lelo Dot, £119.25, does the job incredibly well) but the combination of water and warmth is incredibly relaxing. The 'pleasure jet' is a little bit softer. Focusing on a larger area, it catches more of the clit, although I found it a touch ticklish, so you really need to get your head in the game to get it to truly perform. 

While the Womanizer x Hansgrohe Wave Clitoral Stimulation Shower Head, £99.99, will remain in my shower until I decide to move — and yes, I will be taking it with me — I would say it probably works better when lying in the bath, or if you have another water jet above to keep you warm. It really can catch the clit with a wonderful warm, wet sensation that’s sure to induce orgasm, but it’s hard to stay in this sexy mindset when you're shivering because the hot water is aimed only between your legs.