Kendall & Kylie’s Music Videos Are Just Like J.D. Salinger Stories (Seriously)

Kendall and Kylie are the youngest and currently the most vital of the Kardashian/Jenner empire. Certainly they’re the loudest, with Kim settling deeper into family life (when she’s not annihilating Taylor Swift’s credibility) and Khloé seeing her talk show go the way of the dodo bird. But did you know they used to make music videos? They totally did. But only five. They’re like the J.D. Salinger of music videos, basically. Start strong and then fade away. If you’re keeping score, they’re currently in the phase of life where they retire to Massachusetts and carry on inappropriate relationships with young fans. That’s where Tyga comes in. In keeping with that totally unforced analogy, we’ll be comparing their music videos to J.D. Salinger books and stories. Tall Girl, which is set to John Legend’s “Green Light” is the Catcher in the Rye. Kendall is walking around on someone else’s shoulders. They’re shrouded in a trench coat, but she’s pretending to be this big adult. Inside, however, she’s just a girl. Just like Holden Caulfield. Don’t investigate that analogy further.

Firework, soundtracked to Katy Perry’s “Firework,” is clearly Franny and Zooey. Two young siblings of obvious precocity show off, drawing various people into their orbit. The final scene, in which Bruce is held up by the sisters, is like the final revelation of Seymour’s dark secret. They’re carrying the burden of their patriarch the whole time. This is deep, just go with it.

“Keepin up with Kendall and Kylie- We keep up!” is a lot like “Uncle Wiggily in Connecticut” from Nine Stories. It’s like that in that it’s silly, not very good, and features the surprise death of a character at the end. In “Uncle Wiggily,” the death is Jimmy’s. In the music video, it’s the laptop’s.

“Better Than Revenge” is an amazing cover of a Taylor Swift song. “A Perfect Day For A Bananafish” is a story in which a man talks to a child, talks to his wife, and then shoots himself in a shock ending. That young man, Seymour Glass, is Taylor Swift. The child is the Jenner/Kardashian children. And obviously the gun is Kim.

“Super Bass” is like the J.D. Salinger story “Teddy,” also from Nine Stories. “Why?” you ask. Well, they’re both on boats. Boom, did it.