The Two-In-One Product That Actually Helps Me Get To Work On Time

I think a lot about the biological clock — not the one that supposedly sounds an earsplitting alarm when it's about time to pop out a baby, but rather the grand-scheme circadian function of the body's internal "molecular timepiece." I think that maybe mine was set out of sync from the get-go, giving me a body that wants to stay up all night and sleep all day and a brain that often finds it's two hours later or two hours earlier than originally believed.

And it's not just my biological clock proper that's been glitching for a quarter of a century; my perception of time and how it affects me is also skewed. On a conscious level, I can look at the time and recognize that I'm late, of course, but my body says, "Hey, it's cool, don't worry. Time is a construct, and there's no such thing as 'late.'" (Yes, I am aware that this is not how the world works, and I do my best to satisfy those conventions in my day-to-day life.)

Maybe that's why the appeal of multitasking beauty products, and the time-saving five-minute makeup routine, has always gone over my head. Like, why? What am I saving time for? And really, how much time can a person realistically save by also putting their lipstick on their cheeks? I have my doubts. But I've found that it isn't necessarily time that I save when I use my favorite Onomie Boosting Lip + Cheek Stick — it's thought... and space in my already-overflowing tote, now that I no longer feel the need to carry a lip color for every possible mood.

When I get ready in the morning, I swipe Cruz, a lush berry shade, diagonally from the center of my cheeks up toward my temples and blend, blend, blend with the Cheeky Blending Brush to get a dewy, just-power-walked-a-mile flush, and use my finger to smudge it into my lips for the kind of rosy, fresh-faced glow you only see on actual children and Margot Robbie. Something about using the same color all over just makes it look — and feel — so easy and effortless, and it's perfect for every mood and every time of day. Or it would be... if time was real, that is.