If you had “deadly worldwide coronavirus pandemic” on your 2020 bingo card, Saturday Night Live is handing out your prize: a one-way ticket to terror. On last night’s “Weekend Update,” breakout featured player Bowen Yang reprised his Chen Biao character to stoke our coronavirus outbreak fears.
“China’s got this, okay!” declares Biao, who is the newly-appointed health minister. Anchor Michael Che skeptically notes that Biao was a Chinese trade representative on his last “Weekend Update” appearance, but Biao assures him that he has been watching plenty of medical shows on TLC, like Dr. Pimple Popper, and is therefore qualified to tackle the contagious coronavirus. This is totally fine!
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Che also brought up accusations that Chinese officials are not telling the world about the true extent of the virus’ spread — and Biao swatted that down. “How would [China] even do that, with our state-run media? I have nothing to hide, Che. I show my nipples on dating apps. I’m talking full areole.”
Like myself, Che wasn’t relieved, but Yang’s Biao character is so hilarious, I’m laughing to keep from screaming. And with that, I’m going to put my surgical mask back on and lock myself in my apartment. You can watch the full sketch below.