Dirty John: The Betty Broderick Story Episode 4 Recap: Gaslighter

The opening three episodes of Dirty John: The Betty Broderick Story laid out first the high emotions involved in Betty and Dan Broderick's contentious split, then the origins of their relationship, and then the cracks in the foundation of their seemingly perfect partnership. The fourth week sees how each half of the couple (played by Amanda Peet and Christian Slater) experienced the final months of their marriage as Dan embarked on an affair with his receptionist-turned-paralegal Linda Kolkena (Rachel Keller).

"More To It Than Fun" begins with a jump back in time showing what Dan and Linda were doing during moments of episode 3: First, how their casual flirtation in the lobby led to his hiring of her as a receptionist then as a paralegal, despite her inexperience. It was through the late nights Linda would spend trying to perfect her typing and working hard to learn about her new job that they began to bond, and it was during that time when Betty began to suspect there was something more there (and called the office to check if Dan had fired Linda like she demanded).

In the continuation of last week's scene where Betty confronted Dan about not firing Linda, she asks him point-blank whether or not he is sleeping with his paralegal. Dan lashes out, but truthfully denies sleeping with her (or ever having done so). At that time, it was true — but Betty was clearly picking up on vibes that were there. In fact, it's shortly thereafter, in October 1983, that a late night at the office turns into something more for Dan and Linda and they kiss.

Dan's interactions with Linda and Betty are intercut throughout the episode with testimony from an expert witness on infidelity, a psychologist played by Scandal's Jeff Perry. He discusses the emotional impact infidelity has on a victim's psyche, and introduces the concept of gaslighting to the court. It might be commonly known now, but at the time it was just an old noir thriller about a woman whose husband lies to her and manipulates her into believing that she is going insane.

As creator Alexandra Cunningham told Refinery29 ahead of the premiere, "At the time that Betty went to trial, the conventional societal wisdom about domestic abuse was black eyes. If there was no evidence of that, then there was no domestic abuse and there was no such thing as coercive control."

It's the coercive control that this episode parses. So following the blowup about Linda's continued employment and, finally, ten minutes in, the '80s-tastic credits roll (what is this, The Good Wife?), a distracted and upset Betty heads to lunch with her girlfriends. It's a month after Dan and Linda's kiss when she tells her friends that she suspects he is cheating, but they're sure Dan's not like that.

"Nobody's like that until they are," Betty wisely says — but shakes off her bad feelings when her friends ask about his behavior and he seemingly passes all their tests. The feeling doesn't go away for good, however, and her spidey senses tingle once again when she goes to watch Dan in court and he sees how closely he interacts with Linda.

But again, she shakes it off when Dan comes home with a new convertible and suggests they have a weekend away. It's stereotypical midlife crisis stuff, it's fine, right? But Betty senses more trouble when he tells her that Linda drove him to the dealership in Long Beach, and later, while on the weekend away, she finds him talking on a pay phone with "the office." He insists it's a work emergency, but still — he's talking to Linda on their weekend away. Betty expresses her displeasure by ordering dessert and buying an $8,000 dress.

Again, Betty consults a girlfriend for advice, and she suggests Betty stop by the office to surprise him on his birthday. But when Betty gets there, Dan has already left for the day.

Cut back to the infidelity expert: It's at this time when the behavior of the infidel makes the victim feel crazy, but the infidel insists there's nothing wrong and she is crazy.

Certainly Betty's next move could be characterized as crazy: She goes home and burns his clothes in a bonfire in the backyard. But when he arrives home angry, she eventually apologizes.

Textbook gaslighting, the expert explains to the court: When someone is gaslit, it undermines their sanity and everything is called into question — the victim's self-esteem, ability to trust themselves, even whether they're a good parent or a good person. If you've misread so many things, how can you believe you know anything at all? And the more the lying goes on, the more brainwashing happens so that the victim keeps believing they were wrong.

It's now July 1984, eight months after the affair began, and Dan and Betty are looking at real estate listings. Betty wants to buy a tear-down in La Jolla, California — the land is worth the price for such a lovely location for their new family home. They visit a doctor to inquire about reversing Betty's tubal ligation surgery to see if they can have more kids. Later, when it's clear that's not an avenue the couple is going to pursue, Betty admits to her friend that she doesn't actually want to do it, but she wanted Dan to know she would have if it's what he wanted.

It's September 1984, eleven months after the affair began. Another secretary who's been with Dan since the beginning finally calls him out about his behavior with Linda, and how she talks about their relationship to the office. His tone immediately changes from friendly to stern, and he tells her that he's been miserable for many years and he's behaving the way he wants to.

But it's not until three months later, in December 1984, that things begin to change — Linda is upset that she can't talk about her relationship with her family, who are concerned about her ability to find a man. Dan finally consults a lawyer friend about the steps he needs to take to protect himself as he initiates a divorce. And by "himself," he really means his assets.

The lawyer clearly outlines the steps to take to make sure divorce expenses are covered via community property during a divorce: The date of separation has to be clearly marked via a two part test. First, one person must move out of the family home, and second, at least one person has to have the intent of ending the marriage. After that, any expenses incurred come out of community property: like, for example, a down payment on a house in La Jolla that one person never intends to live in. The lawyer also advises to be kind and, once he's ready to announce his intent to divorce, that he tell Betty the way he would want to be told. After three episodes of being introduced to how calculated Dan can be, that seems to be one piece of advice he will not heed.

Naturally, the gaslighting continues. As the expert tells the court, unless the victim is finally told they were right, as long as there is no resolution for the victim at all, healing does not take place.

On February 28, 1985, Dan finally comes home from work and starts packing a bag, telling Betty he wants to be alone to think because he never has time to think about anything. The next morning, Betty tearfully tells the kids that their father will be spending some time away from the house to work on himself, but he loves them very much. By the time she has lunch with her girlfriends, she seems to have convinced herself that it's all going to be fine. Her friends are alarmed, but Betty says it's just temporary until they move into the La Jolla house together.

Betty continues to pack for their move, and Dan comes home particularly amorous one night and they bang it out. If you were trying to convince yourself there was nothing wrong in your marriage and then your husband came home for some hot sex, it would be very easy to delude yourself into thinking your instincts were wrong.

But it's now April 1985, 18 months into the affair, and Betty and the kids have moved into the La Jolla house. Betty's chatting on the phone with Dan and wondering when he's going to get his stuff packed and moved into their new home — but he tells her that he's not coming. He's moving back into their Coral Reef house.

Later, Betty and the kids come home and there are rats everywhere. But she frantically calls Dan for help, but he's like, "I don't know what you want me to do, you have a credit card, deal with it yourself." When he gets home from work, Betty has dropped the kids off at his house and flown to her dad's 75th birthday party back East. He's been having fun on his own, so maybe he needs to be reminded about his responsibility in caring for his four children. The power move backfires, because when Betty returns from the trip, Dan tells her that the kids are at camp, she can't pick them up because she's not listed as next of kin, and when they return he's filing an emergency motion to get full custody.

So, uh, yeah, he didn't take that advice about kindness. But it's clear his legal play worked, because now it's September 1985 and Betty's on the phone wishing the kids a happy first day of school when she's served legal papers. She tries to find a lawyer, but the first person she asks is the pal who's representing Dan. He tells her that he can't represent her, and she has to be a "good soldier" or she risks losing custody of the kids. Later, Dan and Betty go over her monthly expenses, and he cuts her a check and tells her to contact him when she gets a lawyer.

Cut to the expert, who says that at this point, what the victim wants more than anything is any type of relief to the burden they're carrying. It's like a pressure valve, and the steam is finally let out. The victim's pain and anger increases as the pressure releases, making the victim think their life is a joke. (This explains why, when Betty goes to see the kids on one of her visitation days and Dan isn't even there, she freaks out and spreads a cake all over the house.)

In October 1985, two years into the affair, Dan storms over to Betty's with a court order barring her from the Coral Reef property. Betty implores Dan not to ruin their family life together. He continues to insist that nothing is going on with Linda, but Betty wants him to admit it — and if their marriage is ending anyway, it doesn't matter if he's having an affair or not so he should finally tell her the truth.

He finally admits it: He's in love with Linda. All that time — two full years of an affair — and Dan doesn't admit the truth about it until now. It's of course not an excuse for murder, but it does provide a lot more context for why Betty's behavior escalated so drastically.

As writer Cunningham explained, this is what made her want to tell Betty's story: "I could put myself into her shoes and feel that panic and desperation — the idea of being abandoned, being lied to, being alone, thinking about what would happen if I found out I had been lied to for years. What would that do to my sense of reality and trust and belief that I was sane?"

Dirty John: The Betty Broderick Story airs Tuesdays at 10 p.m. on USA Network.