Anyone Else Having Really Dark Thoughts While Watching Kevin Can F**k Himself?

Spoilers are ahead. I like to think that I am generally not murderous person. I don't believe in the death penalty and I feel confident in saying that murder is, on the whole, bad. But Kevin Can F**k Himself has me second guessing my entire stance on the issue. After watching the first few episodes, I just can't help it. I think I want Allison (Annie Murphy) to kill Kevin (Eric Petersen) — and I want her to get away with it.

When Allison first started daydreaming about killing Kevin, I thought, "That's funny, but I really hope she doesn't do that." But then, she got to the library to look up how to get away with murder and the firewall blocked her request, calling it inappropriate content. And yet, a just a few stations over, a dead man was using the same library computer system to watch porn. And it got me thinking, do I want Allison to live in a world where a woman can't Google murder, but any old man can watch porn in public — without headphones?

Later, Allison decided to try to get pain meds (to kill her husband and make it look like an accidental overdose, but the doctor had no way of knowing that). When she asked for medication for her pain, instead of listening to her, the doctor automatically suggested they call her husband. And, again, I thought, do I want Allison to live in a world where a woman can't get her doctor to believe her when she says she's in pain?

And then, the final straw: Kevin's own actions. From Kevin's obsession with the "Belichick Hoodie" — which he criminally spent hundreds of dollars on (at least) — to his petty, frat-boy war with the new neighbors, everything Kevin did in episode 2 seemed to add pros to the "Murder Kevin" idea. And then he adopted a dog only to unceremoniously abandon it on the street. Before this, Kevin was guilty of being an immature, inconsiderate, lazy husband, but abandoning a dog? That's next level.

So now, every time I see Kevin's goofy face or hear his absurd plans, like his spur of the moment chili cook-off in episode 3, I think maybe I wouldn't mind so much seeing him gone. And I definitely wouldn't mind seeing Allison get the satisfaction of killing him and escaping his dumb sitcom life.

I really don't enjoy rooting for people to kill others on television shows, especially when there's no direct threat to anyone's safety involved. But, I have to be honest, I've probably rooted for a man to kill someone for a lot less. (See: Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, or basically every single episode of Dexter.)

Not only that, but sitcom wives have been killed off for much less. Just look at Donna Gable (Erinn Hayes) of Kevin Can Wait, who was killed off after one on the CBS comedy, thus, sparking the creation of Kevin Can F**k Himself. According to star Kevin James' interview with the NY Daily News at the time, she was killed off because "this was needed for this show to drive forward."

Using that same logic, we could consider that Kevin on Kevin Can F**k Himself committed a serious act of animal cruelty while consistently taking advantage of his wife. And that Allison is moving beyond her sitcom life with Kevin, thanks to her budding friendship with Patty (Mary Hollis Inboden) and her reconnection with Sam (Raymond Lee).

Taking all of this into consideration, I just feel like Kevin's death in Kevin Can F**k Himself would really drive the story forward, don't you?