We knew that Bachelor in Paradise season 7 was going to be hot. Between the stacked cast of singles, surprising hookups, and explicit nudity we saw in the season promos, it came as no surprise that Night 1 held a record amount of horny make out sessions.
What we didn’t quite anticipate, however, was how distracted we would be by the other kind of hot — and by that, we mean temperature hot. Last night, it looked like everyone was seconds away from melting into the sandy beach.
Excessive sweating has been somewhat of a fixture in the BIP universe. Season 4 introduced us to Sweaty Blake, who sweat so much during his introductory hellos that one woman called his shirt “a towel” and another surmised that he’d have “a hard time getting a date.” Then, of course, there was dear, dear Matt from Season 5, who was so nervous to kiss Sydney that he looked like he was about to straight up evaporate into the air. And we can't forget Tahzjuan, whose battle with the excessive temperatures basically ended with her surrendering her spot on the show and leaving paradise. Thankfully, she's back this season — and still seems to be affected by the weather.
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In fact, most contestants on this season complained about the heat at some point in the premiere. James (the Box Guy) de-robed the minute he got on the beach, and many told Kenny, who showed up to paradise naked, how jealous they were of his, ahem, natural cooling technique. Some, however, decided to get one step ahead of their sweat: while Tahzjuan defeatedly stuck oil-blotting papers to her forehead, Champagne girl Kelsey turned into Milk of Magnesia girl Kelsey, touting a new trick she learned to keep her makeup from melting off (looking forward to seeing how that goes).
Seriously though, is it just me or has sweating become the main character of Bachelor in Paradise? Out of all the beach-related dating shows on air — Too Hot To Handle, Love Island, Fboy Island — it seems like BIP is the only one where people are constantly visibly overheating. Is everyone OK?
According to *the internet*, in June 2021 Sayulita, Mexico saw a daily high of 84 degrees Fahrenheit with around 81% humidity, which basically sounds like a normal summer day in New York. It's also very similar to September in Turks and Caicos, where Too Hot To Handle is filmed. Majorca in June is a tiny bit more mild (Love Island UK's location), but that's the least they can do to make up for their hilariously low budget.
It's undoubtedly a funny bit, and it's always a comforting reminder that the people we see on reality TV are real, and therefore susceptible to pit stains. But at this point, sweating in viewers' faces has gotten to be such a plot point of BIP that I'm more worried about someone passing out than someone not finding love. That's not the kind of drama we want — so how about a few more air conditioned dates this season?