The Kayla Nicole Backlash Reveals The High Price Of Oversharing For Black Women

Kayla Nicole has found herself at the center of a social media storm after making a surprising confession on a recent episode of WNBA star Angel Reese's podcast, Unapologetically Angel.  The influencer's candid admission about a past breakup has sparked negative backlash online after revealing the craziest thing she’s done after a breakup. Now, Nicole is speaking out about her regretful decision to share such a personal story about one of her past relationships.

On Tuesday, Nicole appeared on the I Am Athlete YouTube show and addressed the recent criticism she's received since admitting to dressing up as a famous woman for Halloween because she believed her ex left her to be with the celeb. Internet sleuths quickly discovered Nicole was referring to dressing up as Teyana Taylor and the man she was dating was Iman Shumpert. "After the podcast came out, I thought I handled things with grace," Nicole said tearfully. "I thought I answered the questions to the best of my ability. The public had their interpretation of things – it didn't matter to me.”

She continued, "My mom calls me, though, and it's those conversations that matter to me. Because she [my mom] is offended. She's hurt by the way people are perceiving her daughter. She's hurt by the negative headlines and the way people are spinning it. And even my mom is like, 'Maybe next time we don't answer those questions.'"

I couldn’t agree more with Nicole's mother’s advice because like clockwork, social media wasted no time doing a deep dive into Nicole's past after Reese’s podcast aired. So let’s be real, the risks of oversharing online are severe, especially for Black women and unfortunately, Nicole's recent experience serves as a crucial reminder of this.

Since appearing on the podcast, Nicole has been the primary target of an unwarranted amount of criticism, cyberbullying, and hate, including racist attacks from Taylor Swift's fans, who have now re-entered the chat once again (Nicole previously dated Swift's current boyfriend, Travis Kelce). In this digital era where sharing personal details has become socially acceptable, is the fleeting notoriety that follows worth it? In my opinion, absolutely not, because Nicole is now paying the price of being too open on the internet.

It's one thing to share about your personal experiences. But, when other people are involved (especially celebrities or other public figures), it's easier for statements to be misinterpreted or misconstrued. And when you're a Black woman on the internet, your oversharing isn't interpreted as cute or brave (like the white women who download intimate details on podcasts like Call Her Daddy), it's seen as obnoxious and crude. While authenticity is admirable, the line between keeping specific details private and public has become somewhat blurred. There's a difference between authenticity and oversharing and a line needs to be drawn at some point. 

Although Nicole avoided mentioning names, while sharing one of her "favorite crazy Kayla stories" (she claimed to have few such stories), the details she shared pointed to recently divorced couple, Shumpert and Taylor.

"I was dating a guy, and he dumped me through a text message," Nicole said on Unapologetically Angel. "And he dumped me for this singer and actress who was famous at the time. He dumped me for her and lied about it for months. Then, he popped out with her and became this public thing…And, of course, little old me is devastated. I'm heartbroken. I had just moved to New York to be with this person and move in with them.”

She further explained: "It was a whole thing. You guys won't be able to figure this out. Or maybe they will — who cares, it doesn't matter. He breaks up with me and moves on. And for Halloween that year, I dressed up as her." 

With these few but intimate details, a Halloween photoshoot featuring Nicole in a look similar to Teyana Taylor's 2016 “Fade” music video revealed Taylor as the anonymous woman in question she was referring to. Taylor tied the knot that same year with Iman Shumpert. 

Although Nicole now considers this a lesson learned and can laugh about her actions, others, including Taylor, have yet to find the humor. The A Thousand and One actress clapped back at the influencer in a lengthy Instagram comment under The Shade Room's post that has since been deleted. 

"I'm divorced, and happily so," Taylor wrote. "However, her choice of words was very distasteful and uncalled for. She knew exactly what she was doing. That lady said, 'She was famous at the time,' and 'idc who saw it.' It was very distasteful & uncalled for," Taylor emphasized.

While I don't believe Nicole intended to "shade" or take a jab at Taylor, her delivery was a bit off-putting. Given her highly publicized and tumultuous divorce, it's understandable that Taylor felt blindsided and upset by Nicole's comments. I think Taylor has every right to feel frustrated; her response is a testament to the emotional toll a divorce can take, and her feeling disrespected was warranted. Nicole's attempt at remaining cryptic failed horribly and her decision to share too many personal details about an old flame raises an important question about oversharing: How much is too much?

Here’s the thing, revealing too much on social media creates a revolving door for judgment, criticism, biased opinions and negative backlash. Nicole's situation is a harsh reminder that the Internet can be a cruel and unforgiving place — especially for Black women — but despite Nicole's actions, she doesn't deserve the harassment. Her situation is a cautionary tale of the unforeseen results of being “too transparent.” While she has the right to share her experiences, it's important to weigh the potential consequences before doing so. In this case, the risks clearly outweighed the rewards. Not to mention, there is a time and place for everything. And honestly, this wasn't the time, place or platform for any of it.