Let’s All Go To The (Bushwick) Mall…What?

When walking from dinner at Roberta's to your pal's loft party, have you ever thought to yourself, "y'know, what Bushwick really needs is a mall"? Of course you have. We all have. Nothing would suit those unwashed blocks better than a giant prefab shopping center wherein residents could scoff at the people lined up in front of Cinnabon and ironically shop for sexist T-shirts at Spencer's. Well, though these dreams may not come to pass, a development company is planning to make the massive brick building across from the Morgan L stop a mall. Alas, it may not actually be the citadel of UGGs stores and Brookstones Bushwick haters might have hoped for. Unfortunately, creators promise something along the lines of a “grittier Chelsea Market,” with a movie theater, studio workspace for artists, an Urban Outfitters, and a Guitar Center. What, no Build-A-Bear? No Ed Hardy? No Hollywood Tans? Seems like an opportunity lost, if you ask us. (Brokelyn)