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Is Your Astrological Sign Holding You Back From Finding Love?

photographed by Meg O'Donnell.
If it's been a while since you've had sex (and you're, er, a little frustrated with how long it's been), it's tempting to look for something to blame. Maybe you're just not interested in dating at the moment. Maybe no one's struck your fancy recently. Maybe the thread count of your sheets is too low. More insidiously, some of us may feel inclined to flat-out blame ourselves, and specifically our flirting game, for our quiet sex life. First of all, going through a sexual or romantic dry spell is totally normal and not something you should beat yourself up over. Second of all, any awkwardness or lack of game on your part might be out of your control, and hiding in plain sight in your birth chart.
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If you haven't looked up your birth chart online or had it read by an astrologer, you might not know that it reveals more than just your sun sign (the sign you read your horoscope for). Namely, your birth chart shows you your planetary signs, or the locations of each planet on the Wheel of the Zodiac the moment you were born. Each planetary sign is believed to define a specific component of your personality, rather than your general likes and dislikes. For our purposes today, your Venus and Mars signs are particularly illuminating, since they can tell you more about how you flirt and what you find attractive in others, respectively.
If your Venus sign is something predisposed for romance, like Taurus, or social charm, like Libra or Gemini, your might be naturally alluring — and thus have your flirting practice down to a science. On the other hand, having your Venus in a sign like Virgo, Capricorn, or Aquarius, might put you at a slight disadvantage when it comes to wooing others. While the first two of these signs can tend to act aloof or downright cold around new people, the third is more likely to be friendly but might not be interested in finding common ground with others. It isn't that certain signs can flirt and others can't — more accurately, flirting and being playful with a romantic prospect may come more easily to some.
As far as your Mars sign goes, having the red planet in a passionate fire sign like Aries or Leo can imbue you with some serious sexual magnetism. These signs know what (or, more accurately, who) they want and aren't afraid to pursue it. Earth signs can be just as aggressive as fire signs, thanks to their grounding in the sensual, physical world. But, if your Mars is in a more timid, sensitive, or cerebral sign, like Pisces or Libra, you might not feel comfortable telling someone directly that you're interested in them. Hesitating or taking time to feel someone out isn't a bad thing, but it might mean having to be more patient when it comes to finding love (or, depending on your goals, good sex).
Now it's time for an astrological disclaimer: Remember that these are just two placements within your overall birth chart — in no way should they be expected to explain the entirety of your behavior as a dating and love-making person. Taking a look at your Venus and Mars signs should simply offer you a new lens through which to view your flirting and hookup style.
And adopting this new perspective might help you discover a whole new approach to dating that you'd never considered previously. That aforementioned Virgo Venus might realize that they're better off meeting and getting to know potential partners in a more private setting — not at the bar or in a big group. Or, someone with a Pisces Mars might find more success in love by letting their creative talents do the talking for them. Incorporating astrology into your dating strategy shouldn't make you feel limited or doomed. Rather, it should make you feel more informed about your desires — and how to satisfy them.

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