Annie Murphy Has The Best Beauty Tips For Gargoyles Who Live In Caves

Annie Murphy describes herself as “a person you know of only because [she] acted in Schitt's Creek.” The Emmy Award-winning actress (and her signature self-deprecating sense of humor) is underselling it. While, yes, you likely know Murphy from her role as Alexis Rose from Schitt’s Creek, the Canada native also starred in AMC's underrated dark comedy series Kevin Can F**k Himself, as well as the critically acclaimed second season of Netflix’s Russian Doll.

While her best-known character is never seen without high-glam hair and makeup, even in a small town in the middle of nowhere, Murphy's off-screen look is a lot more low-maintenance: Think naturally full eyebrows, dewy skin, and the occasional red lipstick when she's feeling "fun and fancy."

Below, Murphy recounts every step in her beauty routine, from her morning musts to her night-time routine, and why she stopped wearing one of Hollywood’s most popular fragrances.

“Wake up.”

“I wash my face with Caudalie cleanser, spritz it with Caudalie spritz-stuff, and slap on some Caudalie eye cream, then some SkinCeuticals Vitamin C serum. Then I do my first face shave of the day — including eyebrows — with Bic EasyRinse Razor.” [Murphy’s signature voluminous eyebrows have earned her a gig as the spokesperson for Bic’s newest razor, alongside fellow hirsute star Eric Andre.]

“I… literally just started using sunscreen about a month ago. Sorry, future Annie! It’s SkinCeuticals Physical Fusion UV Defence SPF 50 (which will hopefully make up for lost time).”

“I am an evening bath kinda gal.”

“I've been using Dior foundation and applying it with some sort of beauty blender for years, but I'm an easy bandwagon jumper if anyone has any better suggestions. Unless Dior wants me to be a spokesperson, in which case, #Diorlyfe.”

“I often have the lips of an old gargoyle who has lived in a moisture-proof cave for the last 300 years, so I always use Kiehl's overnight lip treatment — oh yes, even during the day. And if I'm feeling fun and fancy I put on a little Del Rio lipstick from MAC.”

“I waxed the hell out of my eyebrows in high school, because people made fun of me for looking like the angry baby from The Simpsons. But now?! The brows are entirely wild and free, save for the bi-annual Plucking of the Strays.”

“That Dior foundation I mentioned. Orgasm blush from Nars, L'Oréal Voluminous Mascara in Very Black. This is literally all I do, ever. SHE'S LAZY, FOLKS!”

“L'Oréal Voluminous Mascara in Very Black.”

“I bought myself a Ziip device a couple of years ago. If you enjoy being able to give yourself a temporary face-lift whenever you feel like it, it's worth every penny.”

“​​I wouldn't say confident, but hopeful — my nightly routine always makes me be like, ‘Maybe in the morning, it will be better!’” 

“I wash my hair almost every day (which I know I shouldn't) with whatever's in the shower (which also isn't ideal) and then let it air-dry or put it in a top knot, because I am a gargoyle in a cave.”

“See above, or sometimes if I'm bursting with energy and inclination, I do a messy wave with my straightener.”

“I just bought a Qure LED Light Therapy Mask, which I wear mostly just to scare the fuck out of whoever is with me at the time.”

“Caudalie has a really nice body lotion that I use sometimes — when I feel I've earned it.”

“I was very into Santal 33 by Le Labo for a while, until I realized that's what most people in L.A. or in underwhelming restaurants smelled like, so I'm on the hunt again!”

“I go to my friend Kim at Kim Nails in Toronto, and she just does her best given the bitten, uneven canvas I present her with.”

“Same as my morning routine, plus some other SkinCeuticals serum, and a night cream I got from Proven Skincare.”

“I usually just spin around and around in an open field and then look at the first flower I see.”

“I just had my second Morpheus 8 treatment — it's really called that, I'm sorry — where it feels like your skin is being both burned and stapled at the same time.”

“45 minutes.”

“I had a facial that almost brought me to tears at Caudalie in Toronto — SO TENDER. (I know I'm talking about Caudalie a lot. They're not paying me, I promise.)”

"Take your finger out of your nose."

"Tiny bangs and a goatee make your eyes look greener."

“NO REGERTS.”

“You can actually eat MOST beauty products!” [Editor's note: This is not true. Please don’t.]

“Kiehl's lip balm, No Pong deodorant, and often a napkin.”

“Belle from Beauty and the Beast.”

“All the ones who have one-month-old looking skin.”