Taylor Swift Takes Over Columbus, Ohio

Taylor Swift is officially on tour. Well, she's been on tour since early May. But, two months in, she's really settled in to the whole shebang. Concerts no longer have that shiny, Swift-is-back quality. Instead, the shows are getting deeper. Fans — real fans, including myself, a snake — are beginning to notice the webs Taylor's woven into her set. The "New Taylor" is beginning to fuse with "Old Taylor" to make a comprehensive, nuanced human being. Maybe that's what Taylor wanted all along — for us to see her as human. I'm speaking metaphorically here, just FYI. I'm an animatronic snake, and do not have real eyes. I use sonar to see sometimes, but mainly I am machine-operated.

That said, the Columbus, Ohio stop was a big one: This show, per Taylor herself, is the biggest production to come to the Ohio Stadium. She shared that fact right before singing "Long Live."
"Long Live," for the non-fans, is a song dedicated to Taylor's fans. (It's also a Hamilton-esque plea for immortality via relevance. The refrain promises that "you will be remembered.")

"This tour, I have to tell you," Taylor said before "Long Live," "This is the most fun I've ever had on a tour. It just is. You guys make it really fun....the thing I wanted to say about this being the biggest production that's ever been in Ohio Stadium is that takes hundreds of people who tour with us. About 250 people tour with us."

She didn't mention me, but that's okay! Someday, she'll say, "About 250 people plus a giant animatronic snake named Dale tour with us." (Sorry, I should have said that earlier. My name is Dale. I hate it.)

Anyway, her point was, a lot of people work on this tour. Not just people on the tour — the staff at Ohio Stadium works on the Reputation Stadium Tour, at least for the days surrounding July 7.

The production in the stadiums, by the way, is literally through the roof. For example, Taylor deploys pyrotechnics during "I Did Something Bad." There's a moment when Taylor pauses after saying "I just felt so..." and the bass thrums twice. When that happens, fireworks explode twice in the background. This is the Reputation Stadium Tour, baby. (Not to mention, a giant snake! Me! There are also other animatronic snakes, but I am the biggest. Trevor is, like, five feet shorter.)

I also want to direct your attention to the moment in "Gorgeous" when Taylor introduces all of the women involved in the Reputation Stadium Tour. International Women's Day 2018 is several months past us, but that doesn't mean we can't celebrate the women of the Reputation tour. The women — at least the ones featured in the video — are:

Finally, below, find a halfway decent photo of me from the performance last night. I actually came on a little early last night. Be honest: Do I look like I'm trying too hard?