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Feel Good Diary

I’m A Therapist & I Spent $700 On Self Care This Week

Welcome to Refinery29’s Feel Good Diaries, where we chronicle the physical and mental wellness routines of women today, their costs, and whether or not these self-care rituals actually make you feel good.
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Today: A therapist spends her time training for a triathlon, drinking non-alcoholic beers, and meeting up with her gaming group.
Age: 30
Location: Baltimore, MD
Occupation: Mental health therapist
Salary: $80,000/year
Editor’s Note: This diary was written in July 2022.

Day One

6 a.m. — I set my alarm for an early wakeup so that I can get to my tennis lesson! I’ve been taking lessons for two years now. I’d always been curious about tennis, and I’ve been loving my lessons. It’s a hard sport. I’m still not great at consistently getting the ball over the net to the spot I want, but I love it. It costs $60 per lesson and I go biweekly. $60
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I finish my lesson, walk home, do a bit of light strength training — planks, wall sits, hip bridges, hip flexor rotations, and modified push-ups — and eat before my 9 a.m. patient. I’m a therapist, and telehealth has made it so much easier to balance work and triathlon training. I’ve been doing triathlons for about four years. I started running in 2016 and loved it but was craving a new challenge and a little more variety after my first full marathon in 2017, so I signed up for an Olympic-distance tri in 2018. I haven’t really looked back.
I honestly don’t feel great after my lesson; a little light-headed and dizzy, so I make sure to drink a bottle of water with DripDrop ORS electrolytes (these are $2 per packet and I normally use two of them). It’s pricey, but tastes good and really helps me stay hydrated during the summer. I would normally shower, but I’m heading to a bike fit after this and will need to shower again anyways, so I just throw my hair up and put on a sweater. A bike fit consists of the bike fitter setting up my bike in a stationary position, watching me ride it, and measuring certain angles (i.e hip rotation, ankle rotation, etc). This helps reduce injury, increase comfort, and overall improve speed and power when riding.
3 p.m. — After lunch and seeing a few patients, I speak with my triathlon coach. We chat once a week about upcoming races and how my training is going. She’s $250 a month (or $62.50 for this week), which is not cheap but also has been well worth the investment. I found her by Googling “triathlon coaches in my area” and found one that sounded like she had an approach that worked with my goals. I have a big race — Nationals — coming up in the beginning of August, and I’m hoping to qualify for Worlds. There are a few different paths to Worlds, but the one I’m hoping for is to place among the top 20 in my age group at age group Nationals. She’s happy my fit went well. $62.50
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While we chat, I unpack two deliveries I got today: my Factor meals ($107 for the week) and Imperfect Foods box (this week’s total was $120). Factor meals are a bit pricey for me to do every week, but I love them. They’re such a good combo of taste, convenience, and nutrition. My favorites are the shredded chicken taco bowl and the vegetable tamale bowl, both of which I look forward to eating this week. I also love Imperfect because it’s so easy to get good-quality groceries (not just produce) delivered to my home. They also don’t use a ton of packaging or plastic, which I appreciate. $227
8 p.m. — I see two more patients and then head out on my run. Today I’m doing tempo work — my least favorite, but also something I know is important. Tempo work varies a bit. Here it consists of running intervals that are at or just a bit faster than race pace. You don’t want to just go out and run at race pace all the time, because that drains the body and keeps you from getting your best performance on race day. Instead, you run at race pace for a few minutes at a time with recovery intervals in between. This gets your legs used to going fast and builds your general running economy. 
I get 7.6 miles done and am a drippy, sweaty mess by the time all is said and done. I stretch, shower, and cook dinner. Tonight it’s Crockpot Buffalo chicken, baked sweet potatoes, and roasted cauliflower, all from the Imperfect box. I also slather Biofreeze all over my legs and feet before going to bed, as I do nearly every night during these heavier training weeks.
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My fiancé heads out to see some mutual friends at a bar down the street. I’d normally come say hi, but I’m not drinking this month (as part of my prep for Nationals) and I need to get to bed early, so I decide to rain check. I’ll see some of them this weekend anyways. I play Sims instead. I then take Naturemade melatonin and CBD oil from LazarusNaturals to help get to sleep, as I usually do.
Daily Total: $349.50

Day Two

5:30 a.m. — Ugh. This is so much earlier than I normally get up and I’m not a fan. On Thursdays I normally see a block of patients in the morning, train in the early afternoon, and then see a block of afternoon patients. However, I'm booked through most of today and can't do that. So, I eat half of a Bobo’s Oat Bar and it’s off to the gym I go (I pay $100 a month, or $25 per week). $25
Today, I do an hour of sustained aerobic capacity bike intervals, where I do four intervals of eight minutes as hard as I can (today, that’s 22mph). My legs honestly feel pretty crappy from yesterday, but they warm up as the ride goes along and I end up feeling good about a productive workout. I get home, quickly shower and eat (on Thursdays I like to have pancakes and sausage from Factor) before my morning patients.
12 p.m. — I eat a Factor meal for lunch and see a few patients. Today my fiancé goes into the office, so I have the house to myself since I’m working from home right now (I do have an office space, but my patients have been preferring telehealth, so I’m just going to ride this as long as insurance companies will let me!). I sometimes like this, but feel a bit lonely today. I play Bob’s Burgers in the background during my notes and text a few friends, and that helps.
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5 p.m. — My fiancé is home, yay! I make an early dinner of chicken and portobello mushroom tacos made from ingredients from the Imperfect box. It’s an intentionally light dinner because I want to save some room for popcorn — we’re on our way to see a pre-screening of Thor: Love and Thunder! It’s a fundraiser for a local state delegate running for re-election. They're passionate about issues related to mental health access and equity, so I like them. The movie is great and we have a really enjoyable evening and buy popcorn and soda. My husband bought the tickets months ago, so I pay for the snacks. We head home and I read a bit before bed. $10
Daily Total: $35

Day Three

7 a.m. — I wake up, eat breakfast, and see a patient. As I do every morning, I take my supplements. I take what may sound like an excessive amount: vitamin D, B-vitamin complex, magnesium, iron, turmeric, probiotic, and fish oil. Each of the bottles are around $10 each. You might be wondering why I don’t just take a multivitamin, and that’s a totally fair question! But I’ve learned from experience that multivitamins don’t get my blood levels high enough, particularly for iron and vitamin D. And if these levels are low, it throws everything off — I get tired, cranky, sluggish, etc. So, while this can be annoying sometimes, it works for me.
12 p.m. — I take my bike out to a local lake and ride for an hour. I’m still getting used to the overall feel of a triathlon bike (they’re highly specialized training bikes), but I was happy with how this went. I head home, eat a Factor lunch, and put on a clean shirt for my afternoon appointment (I only see a couple of patients on Fridays). I would shower, but I’m not done training for the day, sadly. However, my patient never showed, which is unusual. I use the time to work on wedding-related tasks and then head to the gym’s pool for a 45-minute swim. My fiancé and I got engaged in December of 2020 and are getting married next spring.
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My coach has me doing lots of sprint intervals today, and I do 2,250 yards in total. I feel really strong during it which is good, but boy, I am beat afterwards. I shower, eat an oat bar and piece of cheese (gotta get that protein) and put my legs up for a bit. I’m actually not all that hungry, but I know that I haven’t eaten that much today and really need some protein and carbs to replenish.
6 p.m. — We head off to meet my parents for dinner. My parents live across the country but are in the process of moving back to the area, so they’ve been here every so often to work on the house they’re building. I order a virgin mule, my favorite mocktail, and the salmon entree. It’s always nice to see them, and I’m super happy to have them back in the area. They're also kind enough to pay for our tab.
Daily Total: $0

Day Four

8:30 a.m. — I get to sleep in a bit, which is always welcomed! (As a side note, it’s still wild to me that I consider this sleeping in. It doesn’t feel like that long ago that I could sleep in ‘til noon, but living in a city, I just can’t seem to do that anymore). I wake up, grab an oat bar and egg bite, and read in bed with my fiancé before getting up to do my training.
I do 40 easy minutes on the treadmill (a light run with walking intervals to keep heart rate down). I say easy, but I’m feeling very sluggish after the work I did yesterday. I follow that up with a 1,600-yard steady swim, which also feels like garbage. One benefit of working with a coach is that we talk a lot about the sluggish training days. Just a few weeks ago, she cut my training load back significantly because she (correctly) was concerned about overtraining. Today though, there’s no red flags (my resting heart rate is normal, I slept well, I have an appetite, I’m not moody, etc.), so I’m pretty sure this is just normal, appropriate sluggishness. I come home, eat a hodgepodge of things for lunch (turkey meatballs, tortilla, cheese, oat bites, and a plum) and shower.
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1 p.m. — My fiancé and I head to a local brewery to meet up with our gaming group. We meet every few weeks to do an RPG-style game, Kids on Brooms. If you’re familiar with Dungeons and Dragons, it’s similar. From their website, because they explain it better than I can, it’s “a collaborative role-playing game about taking on the life of a witch or wizard at a magical school you all attend: a place full of mystery, danger, and thrilling adventure.” We each create characters and then play them through various situations.
The brewery carries Athletic non-alcoholic beers, my favorite, so I have two which ends up being $7 total. I always enjoy our sessions. It’s a great, inexpensive way to spend time with people and get to make new friends. I really respect all the work that our game master puts into creating a story that is accessible and fun to all of us. I’m brand new to RPGs, while others are quite experienced, so it was probably difficult creating a game that catered to all of our needs, but he manages it really well. $7
4 p.m. — We head home and have an evening in, just the two of us, which is honestly a bit unusual for us for a Saturday night! But we’re happy. After a really hectic June and an upcoming August full of bachelorette parties, friends visiting, birthdays, etc., I decided to try to keep July more low-key (especially since I’m training for a big race and not drinking). We make vegan bratwurst and roasted veggies for dinner from the Imperfect box, and then watch a few episodes of our favorite shows. I drink a diet soda and another non-alcoholic Athletic beer alongside mine.
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Daily Total: $7

Day Five

6:30 a.m. — I’m up early for (what else, lol) a training session! This is what my coach calls a “speed brick,” where I practice three sets of fast biking, transitioning, and fast running. Transition, or where you set up to finish one sport and start the next, is an important skill to practice in triathlon. I’ve missed winning my age group in a race because my competitor was faster than me in transition. To practice, I rehearse running with my bike, taking off my helmet and bike cleats, and sliding on my running shoes and visor. It’s hard, and she was right — I feel like crap afterwards.
The hardest part of transitions for me is speed. In short-course triathlons, races are determined by sometimes a matter of seconds, so you want to do everything involved in transition (taking off cap and goggles, putting on your helmet and shoes, etc.) as quickly as possible. 
11 a.m. — I come back home, make and eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and head with my fiancé down to meet some friends at the local pool. We’ve never been to the neighborhood pool before, and it’s pretty nice — plus it's free! We get tacos afterwards ($3 for mine; I just had one) at a place down the street and chat about life (they’re also planning their wedding, so it’s nice talking to them about our shared experiences) before heading home. $3
3 p.m. — I head down the street to a local theater to watch Jurassic World: Dominion. My fiancé had no interest in going, so I go by myself. I actually really enjoy it! I have the whole row to myself, which is amazing. I spend the time drinking a Diet Coke ($4), eating the SkinnyDipped Almonds I smuggled in from home (hehe), and (since there’s nobody around me) stretching to help recover from this morning’s workout. Afterwards, we make salmon, rice, and vegetables for dinner from our Imperfect box, before sitting down to play a board game. $14
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Daily Total: $17

Day Six

7 a.m. — I wake up, take my vitamins, and eat an oat bar and egg bite. I’m dragging a bit this morning and am feeling bleh about my 8 a.m. appointment (the patient himself is absolutely lovely, it always just takes me a minute to get into early morning appointments!). But, we both wake up a bit as it goes along (thanks, coffee!) and have a good session. Afterwards — and this is a treat for me — I head to a 90-minute deep-tissue massage. But, as the masseuse warned me at the beginning, it didn’t exactly feel like a treat. She gave me options to back down the intensity as appropriate, but I knew that in order to get the structural help I needed, I needed to let her do her thing, which involved putting her entire body weight into the knotted areas in my legs and back. It was super painful, but did feel restorative afterwards. $260
4 p.m. — After seeing a few patients, I head to the pool. I normally would have this day as a rest day, but since I’m in a high-volume training period, I’m following my coach’s plan for me to swim half an hour. It’s still an easy swim — 1,600 yards, steady — but it’s less easy than sitting on the couch would’ve been! But I like swimming, and it’s good to get in some movement.
6 p.m. — I have dinner with a friend from grad school who lives nearby. My fiancé joins us for the first hour, and then goes to our local book club. My friend and I have a lovely time, as always. She’s moving soon, so I give her some empty bins we have and drive her back to her place. I’d been considering stopping by the book club if timing allowed, but I don’t get back until 8:30 p.m., so I just decide to watch a few episodes of Bob’s Burgers and go to bed. $30
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Daily Total: $290

Day Seven

7 a.m. — I wake up, take my supplements, drink my coffee, and eat an oat bar and egg bite. Then, I’m back off to my local lake to do speed intervals on my new bike. I’m much faster today than I was Sunday, so my legs must’ve appreciated the massage yesterday! After coming home and showering, I go to my friend’s house for lunch. She lives down the street and also works from home, so a few months ago we started doing weekly lunches to help with isolation and to break up the workweek. It’s her turn to host this week, and it’s always great to see her!
6 p.m. — I see a block of patients this afternoon. Tuesdays are the one day a week that I work into the evening. I used to do it three evenings a week, but had to cut back this year because I was starting to get burnt out. I’d have to drink coffee to stay alert and engaged until 8 p.m., which would then make it hard to turn around and fall asleep. My relationship and social life were strained by it, too; my fiancé felt like he never saw me since I was basically working when he wasn’t, and I wasn’t really able to do weeknight things to help combat the isolation of solo private practice. Making the change was hard, but it’s so much better this way.
8 p.m. — After the day is done, my fiancé and I walk down the street to watch the Bachelorette with a new friend of ours who we met in our book club. We bring a few beers even though I sadly won't be partaking. She has a lovely setup of snacks — cut up fruit and chips and salsa — and it’s so fun watching the premiere with the two of them (plus it’s a day late, so no commercials!). I'm hoping to host her next time!
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Daily Total: $0
Weekly Total: $698.50
Reflection: I have pretty bad anxiety, and if I don't take care of my health, I can deteriorate pretty quickly. My routine may be a lot, but it helps keep me in check. The opportunity to do regular training has the most positive impact on my wellness. I do usually drink, but given that I've been feeling so much better since cutting out alcohol, it makes me realize what a negative impact it must have been having.

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