I Got My Vagina High, & I Actually Kind Of Liked It

Have you ever dreamed of your genitals getting high?

The thought had never crossed my mind until I found myself staring at a small glass vial on my nightstand. It was emblazoned with gold lettering that read: FORIA. Foria is the world’s first marijuana lubricant, made from THC oil mixed with coconut oil. Its name is a play on “euphoria,” which is how you’re supposed to feel after a few spritzes of the elixir. Some women, after using the lubricant, have claimed to feel ultra-aroused and multiorgasmic or experience a deep, meditative relaxation.

Produced by a marijuana collective in southern California, Foria is “hand-crafted from the female flower of the marijuana plant,” which apparently taps into its aphrodisiac powers for that other kind of female flower. It’s also vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free, and free of additives (this is California, after all). Foria is applied topically and works by seeping into the body’s anandamide receptors, which is how our bodies receive cannabis whether it’s smoked, eaten, or sprayed onto our skin.

But, applying Foria didn’t sound anything like eating a pot brownie. I’m not a regular cannabis user, but weed isn’t foreign to me, either — and I had no idea what to expect from the spray. Would I feel “high” throughout my body? Or would I only feel a buzz in my vagina, as if my nether regions were lazily smoking a joint?

The recommended dosage of Foria is between four and eight sprays (each contains about two milligrams of THC oil). Since this was my first foray into blazing my vagina, I gave myself four spritzes to start. The little, pink pamphlet that came with my vial noted that, unlike a traditional lubricant, Foria is supposed to be used as a “pre-lube,” applied before you feel aroused at all. It takes between 15 and 30 minutes for your body to feel its effects, which can range from “tingling” to “warming” to “multiorgasmic.”

So, I waited — first for 15 minutes, then for half an hour. Nothing.

There’s an old myth that you can’t get high the first time you smoke weed. Could it be that the same thing was happening to my vagina? Or, was my vagina experiencing what often happens to me when I smoke weed — simply falling asleep?

Disappointed with the sheer sobriety of my vagina, I doubled the dose the next night. I gave myself eight ample squirts and made sure to cover my entire vulva as well as the inside of my vagina. Again, I waited half an hour. Still, nothing.

But, although I didn’t feel particularly aroused, tingly, or warm, and certainly not "multi-orgasmic," I was slippery. So, I invited my partner to start caressing me. Instantly, I noticed a difference: I was ultra-sensitive to every touch, particularly on my clitoris. I needed my partner to go super-slowly and even more gently than I normally like, which made our foreplay extremely sensual and slowed-down.

I tend to get distracted during sex — like, Oh, that feels nice. Wait, is that a stain on our sheets? — but with Foria, I felt super-focused. As my partner and I shifted from foreplay to intercourse, we moved at about half the pace that we normally do, and I found it easy to concentrate on the sensations I was feeling.

The sex was noticeably more intense. And, although Foria had increased the blood flow to my vagina, I didn’t feel like my genitals were "stoned." Instead, a lot of the focus I felt seemed to have come from dedicating so much time to foreplay (and remember, I spent a full 30 minutes just relaxing and waiting to feel aroused before my partner even started touching me). The sex felt amazing, but I wasn’t sure how much of it came from Foria and how much of it came from consciously slowing down.

Foria felt good, but it’s not a miracle elixir. It isn’t cheap, either: My five-millileter bottle cost $24, and it was halfway gone after I used it twice. Foria is currently only available to California residents with a medical marijuana license, but it's edging into the markets in Colorado and Washington, too. Still, anyone with access to legal marijuana could easily recreate the mixture (the five-millileter bottle contains 60 mg of cannabis oil, but you can buy a gram of cannabis oil for about $40 at my local dispensary in Los Angeles).

If I do use this spritz again, it will have to be more of a special-occasion tincture than an everyday lube. I don’t expect my vagina to turn into a stoner anytime soon.