When I was a kid, maybe eight or nine, I had what I considered to be the perfect "little-known fact about myself" to share in icebreaker games.
"I have a birthmark around my bellybutton!" I'd say when it was my turn, lifting up my top to show anyone who wanted to see. It looked kind of like a coffee spill on my stomach and I took strange pride in it.
But a year or so after I started talking about my bellybutton, I caught my mom examining my neck at a stop light on our way to the dusty barn where I rode horses every day after school. "You really need to scrub better," she said. "Your skin is all splotchy."
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Scrub? I had to do more than run a Dove bar over my body? It was a revelation of sorts. That night, I took her loofah and some St. Ives Apricot Scrub and exfoliated the shit out of my skin from my dirty neck down to my dirty feet. And I think you can guess what happened: My birthmark washed right down the shower drain.
It was a very disturbing wake-up call, and it's made me obsessive about personal hygiene ever since. I do double body washes — soap followed by sugar scrub followed by more soap — so the only thing one could accuse my skin of being is stripped. But occasionally, there have been cold winter days when my building's old water heater breaks, or when I wake up in a panic 40 minutes before I'm supposed to be at my desk, and only have time for a wipe of a damp washcloth — a "whore's bath," as one's grandma might say. I've always felt disgusting on those days, like I was reverting back to my dirt-crusted, horse hair-covered former self.
Then these Yuni wipes came along and changed the whole no-shower game in a way I didn't think possible. Each Shower Sheet is super-sized — like three facial cleansing wipes put together — so you can fold as you go and not drag grime from one part of your body to another, and pre-moistened with natural antibacterial and deodorizing agents. They smell minty, citrusy-crisp, and sanitary, but not in a sterile hospital way.
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They're the Living Proof Dry Shampoo of body products, which is to say they make my armpits feel just as fresh, shiny, and new as they do after a traditional bath. Seriously. Recently, I felt so clean, so opposite of a rugrat who'd been playing in the sandbox, that I decided to go a second day without showering. (On the third day, I scrubbed, promise.)
I may not have a go-to fun fact anymore, but that's probably for the best. Lifting your shirt at the company new hire meeting is typically frowned upon.
Yuni Shower Sheets, $15, available at Sephora.