ADVERTISEMENT
Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last penny.
This week: "I’m 36 years old and live in Cornwall with my husband and cat. I work remotely for a large charity based in London, where I lived for a few years pre-pandemic. I’m lucky to have the type of role that can be done from home, which enabled me to move back here and keep my job. My husband and I are both from Cornwall and recently purchased our first home together, made possible by having a London salary, which was crucial with the high mortgage rates and competitive market here. While I have worked full-time since I was 16, I never expected to have a well-paying job/career as Cornwall wages are some of the lowest in the country and it’s hard to find a stable career outside of hospitality and retail. Moving to London meant I got my foot in the door at an NGO and I have worked my way up over the last five or six years to a decent salary.
My dad passed away after a short illness 10 years ago and left us an unexpectedly large sum in the way of a life insurance policy and shares in his company. It has completely transformed my life and given me more freedom and financial stability than I’ve ever known, which I still find hard to get used to. After a lifetime of financial scarcity and hardship, I know it was one of his greatest wishes to see us secure, but that was unfortunately only possible in death. It’s been a process to feel okay about spending money on myself and not counting every penny, and I feel I mostly channel it into things that make me feel good (time with friends, exploring new places, rest and relaxation). Recently it’s all been going on DIY and house stuff so I must try and find a balance with those extra outgoings."
Occupation: Business analyst
Industry: NGO/third sector
Age: 36
Location: Cornwall
Salary £46,150
Paycheque amount: £2,924
Number of housemates: One husband plus one cat.
Pronouns: She/her
Industry: NGO/third sector
Age: 36
Location: Cornwall
Salary £46,150
Paycheque amount: £2,924
Number of housemates: One husband plus one cat.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: £550 for my half of the mortgage.
Loan payments: £0
Savings? £15,000 in investments and £24,000 in premium bonds.
Pension? I have a workplace pension, which comes out via salary sacrifice. I contribute 5% and my employer contributes 10%.
Utilities: £1,050 into our joint account each month to cover all bills/mortgage/food.
All other monthly payments: £50 phone, £20 charitable donations, £22 dental plan, £80 gym, £120 personal trainer. Subscriptions: £11.99 Spotify.
Loan payments: £0
Savings? £15,000 in investments and £24,000 in premium bonds.
Pension? I have a workplace pension, which comes out via salary sacrifice. I contribute 5% and my employer contributes 10%.
Utilities: £1,050 into our joint account each month to cover all bills/mortgage/food.
All other monthly payments: £50 phone, £20 charitable donations, £22 dental plan, £80 gym, £120 personal trainer. Subscriptions: £11.99 Spotify.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
No, I dropped out of college to work — a mix of uncertainty about what I wanted to do, social anxiety/depression and wanting to earn.
No, I dropped out of college to work — a mix of uncertainty about what I wanted to do, social anxiety/depression and wanting to earn.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
We NEVER spoke about money. My parents owned their own restaurant and worked very hard, long days. We never went without (nice house, pets, clothes, holidays) but now I look back I realise there was a lot of debt, stress and bad spending habits that meant we probably weren’t as stable as we seemed. When my parents split, they had to sell the house and the business and my dad declared bankruptcy. We moved often for a few years and money was nonexistent, to the point where we sometimes didn’t have dinner money at school, and there was never any extra for pocket money etc. I know my dad hated the situation he/we were in and he always did his best to make us feel secure, keep a roof over our heads and give us extra when he could, but financial anxiety is embedded in my sister and me, even though we are more secure now than most people we know.
We NEVER spoke about money. My parents owned their own restaurant and worked very hard, long days. We never went without (nice house, pets, clothes, holidays) but now I look back I realise there was a lot of debt, stress and bad spending habits that meant we probably weren’t as stable as we seemed. When my parents split, they had to sell the house and the business and my dad declared bankruptcy. We moved often for a few years and money was nonexistent, to the point where we sometimes didn’t have dinner money at school, and there was never any extra for pocket money etc. I know my dad hated the situation he/we were in and he always did his best to make us feel secure, keep a roof over our heads and give us extra when he could, but financial anxiety is embedded in my sister and me, even though we are more secure now than most people we know.
If you have, when did you move out of your parents'/guardians' house?
I moved to Brighton briefly when I was 17/18 but I’d say I fully moved out at 24 after a few years of living with my mum/dad/partner/travelling. This was only due to my stepdad having a space above his business that I could rent super cheaply.
I moved to Brighton briefly when I was 17/18 but I’d say I fully moved out at 24 after a few years of living with my mum/dad/partner/travelling. This was only due to my stepdad having a space above his business that I could rent super cheaply.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
When I left college to work full-time at 16. While I didn’t pay rent and bills, I paid for everything else (food, travel, clothes, phone). When I left to travel for a year at 23, I had no idea where I was coming back to as we didn’t have a family home as such. I felt truly untethered in that moment but also very free.
When I left college to work full-time at 16. While I didn’t pay rent and bills, I paid for everything else (food, travel, clothes, phone). When I left to travel for a year at 23, I had no idea where I was coming back to as we didn’t have a family home as such. I felt truly untethered in that moment but also very free.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
I worked at the cinema from the age of 15. My dad actually went in and got the job for me — I think he was desperate to get me out the house and overcoming my anxiety, and wanted me to have some money that I could spend on doing things with friends.
I worked at the cinema from the age of 15. My dad actually went in and got the job for me — I think he was desperate to get me out the house and overcoming my anxiety, and wanted me to have some money that I could spend on doing things with friends.
Do you worry about money now?
All the time. I worry about losing everything on a daily basis. I check my account constantly. I think of ways I can side hustle and earn more (thanks, Vinted). I feel guilty about spending money on myself yet sometimes I will almost binge-spend, like I’ve gone so long without that I lose control and buy/book everything at once. I know we’re very secure and don’t live beyond our means, and I don’t deprive myself of things that make me feel good like gym memberships and beauty treatments. But it’s really ingrained in me what it’s like to have nothing and how careful I need to be. I worry about having a child soon and them feeling any sense of the financial worry I did growing up. I know its 99% irrational as we have good incomes, savings and assets, and I remind myself how lucky I am every day, but I can’t undo the experience I had for most of my life.
All the time. I worry about losing everything on a daily basis. I check my account constantly. I think of ways I can side hustle and earn more (thanks, Vinted). I feel guilty about spending money on myself yet sometimes I will almost binge-spend, like I’ve gone so long without that I lose control and buy/book everything at once. I know we’re very secure and don’t live beyond our means, and I don’t deprive myself of things that make me feel good like gym memberships and beauty treatments. But it’s really ingrained in me what it’s like to have nothing and how careful I need to be. I worry about having a child soon and them feeling any sense of the financial worry I did growing up. I know its 99% irrational as we have good incomes, savings and assets, and I remind myself how lucky I am every day, but I can’t undo the experience I had for most of my life.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
As mentioned previously, I inherited a lump sum from my dad 10 years ago when he passed away, and another small amount after my grandad passed away the same year. I never even thought about inheritance as my family were not well off, my parents didn’t own any property and I just never thought anything would happen to them so young. It took me a long time to do anything with it and really accept what had happened. There’s no way our London move (which kickstarted my career/allowed my husband to do his master's/enabled me to secure a good salary) and house purchase (mortgage rates were crazy and property in Cornwall hard to get) would have happened without it. We’ve both improved our futures massively because of it and I know that’s what my dad wanted.
As mentioned previously, I inherited a lump sum from my dad 10 years ago when he passed away, and another small amount after my grandad passed away the same year. I never even thought about inheritance as my family were not well off, my parents didn’t own any property and I just never thought anything would happen to them so young. It took me a long time to do anything with it and really accept what had happened. There’s no way our London move (which kickstarted my career/allowed my husband to do his master's/enabled me to secure a good salary) and house purchase (mortgage rates were crazy and property in Cornwall hard to get) would have happened without it. We’ve both improved our futures massively because of it and I know that’s what my dad wanted.
ADVERTISEMENT