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Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last penny.
If you’d like to submit your own Money Diary then please do send a bit of information about you and your situation to moneydiary@refinery29.uk. We pay £100 for each published diary. Apologies but we’re not able to reply to every email.
This week: "I’m a 33-year-old freelance writer living near Bristol. I live with my partner, J, and our angry but cute cat. We moved here almost two years ago because we could afford to buy here and my family is nearby. I’ve only started taking money more seriously in the last five years. I actually wrote a diary six years ago and was in a completely different place: I lived in London with a toxic boy, had more jobs than most people have changes of clothes, had no savings, little income and was miserable. Since breaking up with that lad and subsequently meeting J, I’ve got my act together. I got my first job as a full-time copywriter in 2019 and I've managed to save for the first time. I started to have problems with my health around the same time, though, and eventually went freelance a couple of years later. Pre-COVID, J and I lived and worked in London. When lockdown hit we moved in with our parents, which helped us save our deposit for our house."
Occupation: Freelance writer
Industry: Marketing
Age: 33
Location: Southwest England
Salary: Last tax year (ending April 2024), I earned just over £36k pre-tax. The year before, it was £50k. I’m expecting something between those figures for this coming year.
Paycheque amount: Again, it varies month to month depending when invoices fall. Last year there were a couple of months where I earned nothing and a couple where I earned £5k. Generally I can cover my expenses every month regardless of when invoices are paid.
Number of housemates: One human (my boyfriend, J) and one cat.
Pronouns: She/her
Industry: Marketing
Age: 33
Location: Southwest England
Salary: Last tax year (ending April 2024), I earned just over £36k pre-tax. The year before, it was £50k. I’m expecting something between those figures for this coming year.
Paycheque amount: Again, it varies month to month depending when invoices fall. Last year there were a couple of months where I earned nothing and a couple where I earned £5k. Generally I can cover my expenses every month regardless of when invoices are paid.
Number of housemates: One human (my boyfriend, J) and one cat.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: Our mortgage is £1,380 and we each pay half. We both pay £1,000 into our joint account monthly to cover the mortgage, electricity, council tax, water, internet, sofa finance (on 0% interest) and any other expenses that come up.
Loan payments: I’ve got a student loan which I pay around 9% on any earnings over a certain amount when I do my tax return. I save money for tax and student loan from each invoice.
Pension? I pulled all but one of my pensions from my previous jobs together into one and there’s about £7.5k in there. If I have some extra cash I’ll contribute, but it’s not high on the priority list right now. I’ve got another pension somewhere but not sure how much is in there.
Savings? £3,000 in my personal savings account, plus about £800 excess in the joint account that technically counts. I wiped out my savings when we bought the house. Shortly after, my health got worse and the market dipped so work has been slow enough that I’ve just about made enough to cover the bills and not save much on top.
Utilities: £30 water, £54 internet and TV, £130 electric, £128 council tax (this all comes out of the joint account).
All other monthly payments: £11 house insurance, £23 pet insurance (joint account again). £8 phone, £100 private health insurance. I’ve also got two 0% credit cards that I’m gradually paying off (most of the balance is from over five years ago when I had no money) — the minimum payments each month usually come to about £150. Subscriptions: £7.99 Xbox Game Pass, £9.99 Kindle Unlimited, £9.99 Apple storage (paid individually); £17.75 for my half of Netflix, Disney+ and Amazon Prime.
Loan payments: I’ve got a student loan which I pay around 9% on any earnings over a certain amount when I do my tax return. I save money for tax and student loan from each invoice.
Pension? I pulled all but one of my pensions from my previous jobs together into one and there’s about £7.5k in there. If I have some extra cash I’ll contribute, but it’s not high on the priority list right now. I’ve got another pension somewhere but not sure how much is in there.
Savings? £3,000 in my personal savings account, plus about £800 excess in the joint account that technically counts. I wiped out my savings when we bought the house. Shortly after, my health got worse and the market dipped so work has been slow enough that I’ve just about made enough to cover the bills and not save much on top.
Utilities: £30 water, £54 internet and TV, £130 electric, £128 council tax (this all comes out of the joint account).
All other monthly payments: £11 house insurance, £23 pet insurance (joint account again). £8 phone, £100 private health insurance. I’ve also got two 0% credit cards that I’m gradually paying off (most of the balance is from over five years ago when I had no money) — the minimum payments each month usually come to about £150. Subscriptions: £7.99 Xbox Game Pass, £9.99 Kindle Unlimited, £9.99 Apple storage (paid individually); £17.75 for my half of Netflix, Disney+ and Amazon Prime.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
I went to university and got student loans and the maximum maintenance grant to pay for it. I think my parents helped me out here and there and I worked sporadically as well.
I went to university and got student loans and the maximum maintenance grant to pay for it. I think my parents helped me out here and there and I worked sporadically as well.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
We didn’t really talk about money. I had a bank account from a young age but that was about it. Both my parents are spenders and this probably rubbed off on me: I was the kid that would spend her birthday money and not save anything. My dad hides it better but my memory of money growing up was not really having any extra because we’d spend it. Things were tight for my parents for a while after that but they seem more comfortable now.
We didn’t really talk about money. I had a bank account from a young age but that was about it. Both my parents are spenders and this probably rubbed off on me: I was the kid that would spend her birthday money and not save anything. My dad hides it better but my memory of money growing up was not really having any extra because we’d spend it. Things were tight for my parents for a while after that but they seem more comfortable now.
If you have, when did you move out of your parents'/guardians' house?
I moved out to go to university at 18 but came back for holidays. I moved out “properly” when I finished uni at 21 and moved in with my then boyfriend.
I moved out to go to university at 18 but came back for holidays. I moved out “properly” when I finished uni at 21 and moved in with my then boyfriend.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
I was mostly financially responsible at 21 when I got my first grown-up job. But a few years after that were a bit muddy. For a few years in my mid-twenties I suffered really badly with my mental health and couldn’t work, so I relied on my then boyfriend. After breaking up with him I had nothing (no savings, no income, no plan) so my parents helped me out by letting me stay with them for free and paying the rental deposit on a place when I moved back to London. When I moved out and got the deposit back, I paid them back. During COVID, J and I lived with our parents and because they knew we wanted to buy a house, they wouldn’t let us pay any rent. We moved out when I was 30 and rented somewhere for a year before buying so that’s when I (most recently) became financially responsible for myself again.
I was mostly financially responsible at 21 when I got my first grown-up job. But a few years after that were a bit muddy. For a few years in my mid-twenties I suffered really badly with my mental health and couldn’t work, so I relied on my then boyfriend. After breaking up with him I had nothing (no savings, no income, no plan) so my parents helped me out by letting me stay with them for free and paying the rental deposit on a place when I moved back to London. When I moved out and got the deposit back, I paid them back. During COVID, J and I lived with our parents and because they knew we wanted to buy a house, they wouldn’t let us pay any rent. We moved out when I was 30 and rented somewhere for a year before buying so that’s when I (most recently) became financially responsible for myself again.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
I started waitressing for our school chef (he did functions outside of school) when I was 14. We got paid quite well — I remember him handing us crisp £50 notes for eight hours' work.
I started waitressing for our school chef (he did functions outside of school) when I was 14. We got paid quite well — I remember him handing us crisp £50 notes for eight hours' work.
Do you worry about money now?
Yes and no. I’ve achieved something I never would have thought possible seven years ago in buying a house without any parental help (other than the free rent, which is very appreciated) so I’m less worried about it long term than I used to be. But being a chronically ill freelancer means lots of ups and downs. Some months it’s a stretch to cover all the bills and demand is quite dependent on what the market is doing. I’d like to build up a bigger emergency fund to cover quieter times but my health seems to keep getting in the way. I think if I was well all the time, it wouldn’t be as much of a worry.
Yes and no. I’ve achieved something I never would have thought possible seven years ago in buying a house without any parental help (other than the free rent, which is very appreciated) so I’m less worried about it long term than I used to be. But being a chronically ill freelancer means lots of ups and downs. Some months it’s a stretch to cover all the bills and demand is quite dependent on what the market is doing. I’d like to build up a bigger emergency fund to cover quieter times but my health seems to keep getting in the way. I think if I was well all the time, it wouldn’t be as much of a worry.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
When my great gran died when I was a child, she left £300 in bonds for me, which I think my nan gave me when we bought our house. My grandad also left me £1,000, which I put towards the deposit.
When my great gran died when I was a child, she left £300 in bonds for me, which I think my nan gave me when we bought our house. My grandad also left me £1,000, which I put towards the deposit.
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