ADVERTISEMENT
Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last penny.
This week: "I'm a 39-year-old who is the mum of a 4-year old (M) and in a crumbling relationship with his dad (W). I earn £36.5k, which is way under what I should be earning and due to the cost of living crisis I'm actively looking for a new job (this will help give me a financial buffer if the relationship goes how I'm predicting it will). I have shares and have managed to save £62.5k in there. While this is an amazing amount to have saved, I actually lost £70k in it recently due to a share price drop (something W hasn't let me forget). Between being underemployed, a poor financial decision and my relationship, my confidence is at an all-time low — just what you need when you are looking for new roles. I'm trying to work out what to do for the best for my son while managing day-to-day life and my volunteer work."
Occupation: Research scientist
Industry: Science
Age: 39
Location: Northwest
Salary £36,500
Paycheque amount: £2,000
Number of housemates: Two: my partner, W, and son, M.
Pronouns: She/her
Industry: Science
Age: 39
Location: Northwest
Salary £36,500
Paycheque amount: £2,000
Number of housemates: Two: my partner, W, and son, M.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Housing costs: £400 for my half of the mortgage.
Loan payments: None.
Savings? £62.5k in shares and £4.4k across an easy access saver and ISA.
Utilities: My half of everything is £20 broadband, £80 gas and electric, £60 council tax, £14 water, £13 TV licence. House, car, contents and travel insurance is paid annually.
Pension? I do have a pension and I think I pay 8% of my salary into it and my company contributes something to it. I recently paid off my student loans (Plan 1) and am considering doing what my friend is doing and putting the amount I was paying toward my loans into my pension as an additional voluntary contribution (when I can afford to).
All other monthly payments: £10 phone, £45 M’s swimming lessons, £20 family zoo membership. Subscriptions: £4.99 Netflix, £150 childcare (even with 30 free hours I have increased it to cover the holidays). We do get child benefit and we put this immediately into M’s ISA.
Loan payments: None.
Savings? £62.5k in shares and £4.4k across an easy access saver and ISA.
Utilities: My half of everything is £20 broadband, £80 gas and electric, £60 council tax, £14 water, £13 TV licence. House, car, contents and travel insurance is paid annually.
Pension? I do have a pension and I think I pay 8% of my salary into it and my company contributes something to it. I recently paid off my student loans (Plan 1) and am considering doing what my friend is doing and putting the amount I was paying toward my loans into my pension as an additional voluntary contribution (when I can afford to).
All other monthly payments: £10 phone, £45 M’s swimming lessons, £20 family zoo membership. Subscriptions: £4.99 Netflix, £150 childcare (even with 30 free hours I have increased it to cover the holidays). We do get child benefit and we put this immediately into M’s ISA.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Fortunately I went to university when fees were low (£1,200) and I had a student loan that covered most of my costs. I worked as well and my parents helped out where they could. I recently cleared my student loan, though due to the cost of living crisis I have felt no benefit from my increased pay.
Fortunately I went to university when fees were low (£1,200) and I had a student loan that covered most of my costs. I worked as well and my parents helped out where they could. I recently cleared my student loan, though due to the cost of living crisis I have felt no benefit from my increased pay.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
There was zero financial education from my family about money, except 'don’t get into debt'. This has led to me initially being fearful of debt and hating owing people anything. I am getting better at understanding this isn’t always the case although I still send people any money I owe them immediately). I really wish my parents had taught me about saving, especially stocks and shares, as this could have saved me from making a very costly mistake. Since then I have been actively making space each week to further my understanding in this area to prevent me from doing the same again.
There was zero financial education from my family about money, except 'don’t get into debt'. This has led to me initially being fearful of debt and hating owing people anything. I am getting better at understanding this isn’t always the case although I still send people any money I owe them immediately). I really wish my parents had taught me about saving, especially stocks and shares, as this could have saved me from making a very costly mistake. Since then I have been actively making space each week to further my understanding in this area to prevent me from doing the same again.
If you have, when did you move out of your parents'/guardians' house?
I left their home when I was 18 for uni and fully moved out at 23.
I left their home when I was 18 for uni and fully moved out at 23.
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
At 23 when I moved into a rental and then bought my first home at 24.
At 23 when I moved into a rental and then bought my first home at 24.
What was your first job and why did you get it?
Babysitting family friends' children. I honestly can’t remember how much I earned and I never felt that grown up: I was terrified of ruining their house!
Babysitting family friends' children. I honestly can’t remember how much I earned and I never felt that grown up: I was terrified of ruining their house!
Do you worry about money now?
Yes I do. Inflation has increased the cost of everything and, compared to a year ago, I am significantly worse off despite not paying for childcare. Additionally, the shares I have decreased significantly in value recently, meaning I lost £70k (no, this isn’t a typo). I learned a lot from this very painful experience; had I had a better financial education, maybe I would have fared better. This has put extra strain on my relationship with W as he doesn’t let me forget this, despite me trying to open up communication on finances. This year we have also had back-to-back expensive months, which has diminished my small, easily accessible savings. I am also aware my car will need to be replaced soon — I probably need to get a new one before the MOT in October. I was planning on building my savings this year but due to the past few months being costly I haven’t been able to. I know I have the shares to fall back on and can use them to get a new car if necessary, but I am trying to avoid this. I will need as much cash as possible if my relationship is heading where I think it is. I want to financially protect myself and M.
Yes I do. Inflation has increased the cost of everything and, compared to a year ago, I am significantly worse off despite not paying for childcare. Additionally, the shares I have decreased significantly in value recently, meaning I lost £70k (no, this isn’t a typo). I learned a lot from this very painful experience; had I had a better financial education, maybe I would have fared better. This has put extra strain on my relationship with W as he doesn’t let me forget this, despite me trying to open up communication on finances. This year we have also had back-to-back expensive months, which has diminished my small, easily accessible savings. I am also aware my car will need to be replaced soon — I probably need to get a new one before the MOT in October. I was planning on building my savings this year but due to the past few months being costly I haven’t been able to. I know I have the shares to fall back on and can use them to get a new car if necessary, but I am trying to avoid this. I will need as much cash as possible if my relationship is heading where I think it is. I want to financially protect myself and M.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
I received £10k on graduating that I wasn’t expecting — this was the culmination of three small inheritances that I was unaware of (£1-3k per person who died) and my parents topping it up when they could. This went as my deposit on my first house. My parents also gifted me £12k a few years back after having M, but I knew from my sister that this “gift” came with conditions so I transferred it to M’s ISA to avoid all that and thanked them for their generosity and helping him have a great start in life.
I received £10k on graduating that I wasn’t expecting — this was the culmination of three small inheritances that I was unaware of (£1-3k per person who died) and my parents topping it up when they could. This went as my deposit on my first house. My parents also gifted me £12k a few years back after having M, but I knew from my sister that this “gift” came with conditions so I transferred it to M’s ISA to avoid all that and thanked them for their generosity and helping him have a great start in life.
ADVERTISEMENT