Croakies Are Back, But Bros Aren’t Going To Like Them This Time Around…

If you've been near a public shoreside during any sort of school holiday, you've probably noticed one of the most enduring dude-trends of the last three decades: Croakies. Typically accessorized with a light American lager and a pair of obnoxiously bright board shorts, Croakies have allowed summer-loving bros to make sure they never lose track of their Oakleys during party-time festivities. But, if you prefer your beverages to be served in something other than a bong, Balenciaga has your sunglass needs covered, too.

The high-fashion version of aerodynamic sport sunglasses (the better to chill with on a Jet Ski, my dears), Balenciaga's take improves upon the design Opening Ceremony did for resort, and includes a fastener that wraps around the head. Instead of a bungee cord, these keep your specs in place with what looks suspiciously like a rosette-covered maxi pad. We're not sure what situation we'd be in that would require our sunglasses to stay glued to our faces (and look fancy at the same time), but nevertheless, here they are. We'll shotgun a can of Sofia Blanc de Blancs to that.

The rest of the spring '15 collection was a triumph for designer Alexander Wang, who extended the sport motif to netting-made dresses and streamlined cycling jerseys, and new takes on embellishments that took the bejeweled trend to new, starry heights. But, the jury's still out on whether even high-fashion folks can do anything for sport sunglasses and Croakies. Thoughts?