God Help Us, Jonathan Cheban Has Scoop On Kim & Kanye Divorce Rumors

The Food God should rebrand as the Information God. The longtime Kardashian affiliate and food service entrepreneur provided the dose of reality America so desperately needed after the fake news trend nearly claimed a celebrity marriage. Everyone breathe, it's ok, Jonathan Cheban is here and he has the situation under control. He spoke to E! News at the DailyMail.com Holiday Party and basically was the arbiter of reason. "I just FaceTimed with Kim and Kanye and everyone's talking about some divorce rumors and I was laughing because I didn't hear that all day and I guess everybody else apparently here did and it's so funny to me because it's so not true," Jonathan told the publication. "I don't know where people come up with stories but it's literally hysterical but Jennifer Aniston has also been pregnant like 1,000 times so it's kind of a joke." Cheban, who never met a conjunction he didn't like, went on. "They're in good spirits. I don't want to talk much about them because it's not my business but I do have to say that the divorcing is kind of hysterical, that I will mention, because I just spoke to both of them on FaceTime literally before I was coming here and when I heard that I literally burst out laughing." Facebook should hire Jonathan Cheban to head up the division tasked with dispelling fake news from the site. Snopes should hire Jonathan Cheban as its ombudsman. CNN should put Jonathan Cheban in PIP and let him fact-check guests in real time. The man has a nose for news.