Bisexual Coming Out Stories Bi Week Trevor Project

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Bisexual Awareness Week started on Sunday and, as part of the celebrations, the Trevor Project hosted a #bichat on Twitter to allow the bisexual+ community the space to talk with each other about stigma, mental health, myths, and other things they deal with every day because of their sexuality.

As part of the chat, the Trevor Project asked, "What was coming out as bisexual like for you?" And, like coming out as any other sexuality or gender identity, the answers were incredibly varied.

For some, coming out was no big deal. And a few even did it in fun and lighthearted ways, like using art as a medium:

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Im only out to some close friends, it wad scary but relieving! I came out with this painting I made! #BiChat pic.twitter.com/ZjUbJyHMNv
— Paméla B. (@Pam1256) September 19, 2017

"Hey , Im Bisexual"
"Oh, well , no Shit. You always go on about Attractive women"

and then to the haters "Bisexuals are valid - FIGHT ME"
— Charlotte (@AskaLunaCosplay) September 19, 2017

My coming out was great. Mainly because right before I came out my mom asked if I was a lesbian.
— Addy Payne (@AddyPayne90) September 19, 2017

Dad said, "as long as you're not pregnant!" (I was 19.)
— Amy CK (@CoffeeAndKink) September 19, 2017

For others, it was much more serious and sometimes painful:

I felt pushed away by gay women and fetishized by straight men. No one seemed to think I was legitimate which was hurtful.
— StormofCuteness (@StormofCuteness) September 19, 2017

You don't know what people will say or how they will feel. I've lost religious friends as well as some in the LGBTQ community.
— Dont Give Up! (@megmeg38) September 20, 2017

Scary as hell. I came out on my blog and posted it to FB, but had an anxiety attack and hid the post after an hour. https://t.co/6wMlPSIHWC
— Paul in Vegas (@Bluesaloon) September 19, 2017

Some people took a long time to even come out to themselves:

Rather surprising.Thought, as was married, that I was str8, but 'everyone fantasizes about Sigourney Weaver, don't they?' #ApparentlyNo
— HelenaHandcart (@helenahandcart_) September 19, 2017

It was like saying something out loud I'd known for years. Looking back, it seems so OBVIOUS idk why it took so long to realize. #BiChat
— Galen Auer ??? (@galenauer) September 19, 2017

Terrifying, liberating and "why did it take me so long"...all the feels.
— KellyJane Kennedy (@KellyJaneFK) September 19, 2017

And others acknowledged that coming out is definitely not a one-time thing, and that they'll have to keep coming out for the rest of their lives:

Not a "was" but "always/constantly." First few times was scary, but supported by close friends. Didn't realize it would be lifelong...
— Emily Mills (@millbot) September 19, 2017

more of an "is" than "was." i pass in a lot of contexts, so im constantly figuring out if people are worth the effort.
— Geoff Trenchard (@GeoffTrenchard) September 19, 2017

At first it was scary and I was v nervous. Now it's just tiring to have to do it over and over and have the same biphobic discussions.
— Phizzy (@PhizzyBaby11) September 19, 2017

While some of the coming out experiences people shared were silly, a general theme running through the stories is the need for bisexual people to constantly combat stigma about their sexuality — which comes both from straight people and from people who identify as gay and lesbian.

Having to argue against the idea that bisexuality doesn't really exist, that bisexual people need to just choose a side, and that being bisexual is really just an excuse to be promiscuous isn't just a part of these people's coming out stories. It's something they constantly face in one way or another. Which is why a separate pride/awareness week for bisexual people is so important — and why we need to listen to their stories.

Read these stories next:

Attention, Straight People: Here's What Not To Say To Bisexual People

Why Coming Out As Bi Was So Complicated For Me

What’s The Difference Between Being Bisexual, Pansexual, & Queer?