Illustrated by Austin Watts
Catch a Burlesque Show — and Learn a Few Steps
If the thought of going to a strip club with your man freaks you out (and we don’t blame you), then try watching the burlesque/comedy (you read that right) show “Wiggle Room” at Studio L’amour. The comedic element will keep you from taking the risqué dancing so seriously — which allows you to laugh freely instead of nervously. But if you’re interested in learning a few sexy moves of your own (you never know when you’ll need ‘em), sign up for one of the striptease sampler classes for just ten bucks. The next class is August 17, so shake a tail feather and reserve your spot online.
Date All Over Again
Why is it that some of the spots you used to go to when you first started dating are now among the land of the lost? Don’t get us wrong, the fact that you can have as much fun with your man sans makeup in front of the tele is a very good thing — but so is the rush of getting gussied up and hitting the town every once in a while. One evergreen spot that tops our list is the Violet Hour. It’s dark, ridiculously romantic, and the artfully prepared libations (Juliet and Romeo anyone?) are as tasty as they look. Oh, and come to think of it, the Violet Hour kinda has a bit of Gatsby vibe — go get ‘em Daisy!
Illustrated by Austin WattsTake a Red Light District Sex Tour — Yes, Really
Leave it to a company called Weird Chicago to come up with a sex tour in our very own city. We were surprised to learn that upon this “historical” three-hour tour, you’ll visit spots like S&M stores (for your “Fifty Shades” fix), secret sex clubs, Red Light Districts of both past and present, and oh-so much more. And no, you are not going to be carted around by some perv in a paneled van. This operation is completely legit and was actually featured on an episode of the Travel Channel’s “Extreme Tours” show, and was voted the “best tour in Chicago” by Time Out magazine. Trust, anything you thought was kinky before will pale in comparison to the info nuggets you’ll pick up on this jaunt.
Learn How To Give An Awesome Massage
Sure, the purpose of a massage is to rid your body of kinks and toxins — but it can also be a pretty hot way to start (or end) an evening in. But forget relying on a mobile therapist to do the work. Take matters into your own hands and learn how you and your S.O. can give one another an amazing massage that goes beyond a basic neck rub.
Illustrated by Austin WattsTake The Ultimate Staycation
Room service, crisp sheets — hotels rock. But, if you’ve got romance on the brain, the secluded spa rooms at Trump Hotel Chicago are like a guest room on steroids. With direct access to the Trump spa (services are a must), these rooms boast extra amenities like a rainfall shower, heated herbal eye and neck pillows, yoga mat, and a deep-soaking tub for two. A destination resort feeling without leaving the Windy City? We’ll take it. Rates vary; inquire within.
Take a Steamy Workshop at the Pleasure Chest
If your sex life is on autopilot — and the phrase “doing it with your eyes closed” is not a good thing — then take one of the steamy workshops at the Pleasure Chest. You may recall the name from that old “Sex in the City” episode when Charlotte goes to purchase The Rabbit — a scenario you may be able to identify with yourself. But forget about solo love. These workshops (held in a secluded area of the shop) cover everything from how to give your man (and vice versa) a mind-blowing orgasm to conquering performance anxiety and much more that we blush just thinking about. There is no charge for the classes (reserve your spot on the website) and they are open to all genders and orientations. Yup, the best things in life really are free.