This Exists: A Cocktail Made With Fermented Animal Penises

Culinary, hand-crafted, artisanal. These are all code words used to describe a cocktail that's chock-full of fun and interesting ingredients. But, is there such a thing as being too creative? Yes. In the latest edition of the Chicago Reader's cocktail challenge, Violet Hour bartender Patrick Smith summoned mix master Michael Rubel of Henry's Swing Club to whip up a libation using one key ingredient: three-penis wine.

No, that's not a typo. This down-and-dirty spirit is made with fermented deer, dog, and seal penises. According to bartender legend, it can increase male virility. As for the taste, Rubel told the Reader that it's like "a vintage port that had gone really, really bad and hung out with some sherry and some prunes."

But wait, it gets even grosser: "I think the dog penis really comes through on the finish, which is quite prolonged."

In case you're curious, Rubel explains how to make a Three-Penis Swizzle in the video. The ultimate cocktail? There's only one way to find out...(Reader)