The Best Career Advice From R29’s Salary Stories In 2023

The gender pay gap is alive and well in 2023, with women making just 82 cents for every dollar earned by a man — and the gaps are even wider for women of color and women with disabilities. Here at Refinery29, we — and our readers — know that one of the best ways to tackle our money issues is to talk about them openly, honestly, and without shame.

This year, Refinery29’s Salary Stories gave us all the tea. From interview advice to industry insights to, of course, salary secrets, no career topic was left unturned. Salary transparency is more important now than ever, with inflation sucking our paychecks dry and the cost of living crisis cutting down how far our money can actually go.

Our Salary Stories submissions ran the gamut from a former teacher making $130,000 in the aerospace industry to a fashion buyer who took a pay cut to follow her dreams. Below, we’ve put together the very best salary advice from this year to inspire, educate, and yes, entertain you.

Best salary advice: “Don’t hesitate to ask questions about information you are not sure of. If I could have a redo, I would have sought advice from colleagues who are in full-time positions and asked how they negotiated their salary before accepting.”

Best Salary Advice: “If it matters to you, consult with others about their salaries, promotions, et cetera. Old-school mentality makes it seem like a taboo topic but it doesn’t need to be. It wasn’t until I was a few years into my career that a coworker willingly shared their salary, and it helped me gauge my salary target. From then on, I realized I would be leaving money on the table if I didn’t speak up.”

Best salary advice: “Don’t undersell yourself because you live in a lower cost of living area. While you may not need a higher salary to pay the bills in many southern states, do your due diligence to make sure that the total compensation offered is comparable to what others in your city are making. Don’t accept $45,000 a year if you deserve more!”

Best salary advice: “The best advice that I have received and never actually manage to follow is to negotiate. The world of starting bonuses is quite new to me, and I didn’t realize that was a potential avenue for negotiation. Even if a company has hit the top of their salary range, there is still typically some wiggle room in terms of starting bonuses. As an additional side item, my dad always told me to include benefits when a new company asks for your current salary. So if you make, say, $60,000, but get a $2,000 commuting benefit, a 10% 401k match, and all healthcare costs are paid, you should say your current salary is more like $70,000+.”

Best salary advice: “If you’re feeling nervous about asking for more money for yourself, imagine you’re doing it for a friend or someone you care about as you’re doing the negotiation. It’s always easier to negotiate for others than yourself.”

Best salary advice: “The book Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most was a hugely helpful book for me when it comes to negotiation. Salary negotiations are difficult conversations, and this book does a really good job of understanding how to grow more comfortable in uncomfortable conversations. I think it’s a particularly useful tool for people who identify as women who have been conditioned to be more deferential!

“Another bit of advice: Stay true to yourself. Knowing your worth is obviously important, but the ways you approach salary conversations need to be true to your own values. I express myself best in writing, so I always ask for time during a negotiation so I can articulate my thoughts in a values-aligned way — usually in writing first, and then followed by a phone call or other face-to-face point of connection.”

Best salary advice: “Don’t rely on TikTok advice from unqualified ‘financial coaches’ or ‘hustlers’ who tell you to negotiate aggressively, but don’t tell you how. Instead, use online tools for researching what the market rate is for roles of a similar job title to yours — such as levels.fyi, Glassdoor, and others — and look up what current salary/benefits packages are like for jobs with the same title, responsibilities, and company size as yours. Take that information to the table with you when you approach a salary conversation. Go in ready to advocate for yourself, and go in smart.”

Best salary advice: “The best way to jump salaries is to jump companies. Also, if a company is not able to get to your desired salary during the negotiation process, you can negotiate your sign on bonus to cover the difference in the desired salary for your first two years. For example, my target was $135,000, but [my current company] got me to $125,000, so I was able to negotiate a $20,000 sign-on bonus so that for the first two years I am able to get, in a way, the salary I wanted. After two years, you can reevaluate.”

Best salary advice: “You don’t have to wait for your annual review to ask for a raise. I’ve received two increases mid year in my career because I made a strong case for why I deserved an adjustment. The worst that can happen is they say no and you have a good conversation about why and what it would take for you to get where you want to be.”

Best salary advice: “As a recruiter, I highly recommend keeping your cards close. When a recruiter asks you how much you’re looking for, ask how much the pay band is for the role. This way you won’t potentially really undershoot your goal. I also recommend always negotiating: When you receive an offer, when you get an annual pay increase, or when you get a promotion. Last but not least negotiate everything, not just pay. Ask for a sign-on bonus, stock (if applicable), relocation bonus, more time off, et cetera. There’s a good chance you’ll get something out of your negotiations and the worst outcome is that you get your original package. At least you’ll know you’ve tried your best!”