Girlies, Here’s How To Hold Your Own Space At The Pilates Studio

Women have spoken time and time again about experiencing more “gymtimidation” than men. These conversations have often focused on the weights room, where typically you’ll find more men pumping iron. But, in recent years, that has started to shift. More women are taking up their space in the parts of the gym that have been dominated by men, trying new exercises and building up strength. On the other hand yoga and Pilates classes are starting to see more men attending. These are lower-impact exercises that, for a host of reasons, have been seen as women-dominated activities. But the men who previously would have focused on building muscle are showing up on the mat. 

Now, while it’s great that exercises become less gendered and that everyone can freely attend whatever kind of class they wish, some women feel men are taking up too much space. Common complaints are that men “grunt too loudly” and ruin the ambiance of what should be a calming class. Some women on TikTok have suggested men should be “banned” from these classes. That feels extreme, but this comes at the same time as there’s demand for a new women’s only gym. 

It seems to me that women aren’t annoyed by the presence of men per say, but that they don’t like it when men make themselves more prominent figures in the class than necessary. 

So, why is everyone suddenly flocking to Pilates? Liz Joy Hardie, a senior teacher at MoreYoga, says “there’s more awareness now about how Pilates can help improve physical fitness, strength and mobility rather than its very outdated reputation of being a stereotypically ‘female only’ practice”. She’s seeing the same in yoga, and said that when she started teaching a decade ago, yoga was viewed as an activity for “hippies”. Times have changed, and people are opening their minds to different kinds of exercise. Yoga and Pilates are good for improving mobility, and we’re seeing greater interest in mobility work alongside strength training. People — of all genders — want to do exercises safely and with better flexibility. Even Gymshark — a favourite activewear brand among influencers and young gym goers — now offers lunchtime mobility classes at its studio in London, there’s that much new interest in this side of fitness. 

People want more holistic routines and these modes of exercise are trending. Hardie says: “I think it helps that Pilates is bang on trend at the moment. But many people don’t realise that it was a man named Joseph Hubertus Pilates, a German physical trainer, writer, and inventor who is credited with inventing the Pilates method of physical fitness.” Mobility aside, people are getting to know just how good these classes are for mental health and overall wellbeing. That isn’t to be underestimated, especially at this time of year. “On a deeper level I hope that more men are attracted to traditionally women-dominated classes because we’re making strides in equality and gyms being gender neutral spaces where everyone is welcome,” she adds. “There is still a huge stigma around men’s mental health so the more men embracing practices that support their mental and physical health the better in my opinion.”

A lot of men will come to these classes and barely be noticed, because they’re blending in with the women around them. But for the odd time a man is making a woman uncomfortable — be it through odd grunting or leering — it can put her back in an intimidation mindset. This is the very thing sports companies have spent years trying to prevent, and the very thing these women-dominated exercise spaces eliminated. Though of course, that’s not to say these spaces were perfect, amid the whitewashing of yoga and lack of diversity in race and body type seen at Pilates classes, creating elitism. A BMJ study from 2020 found 91% of yoga practitioners are white, despite it being a practice with its roots in India. It’s also been necessary for groups like Diversity in Pilates to exist, whose goal is to “counter racism in our community”.

Saffron Hooton, author of Strong Woman Era, says: “Sometimes just walking through the door can feel like enough of a challenge without also having to face people infringing on the space you’ve created for yourself.” Hooton says it’s important to stand your ground and be firm with your boundaries, because you’re there to work on yourself just like everyone else and your experience matters. “Judging a person’s intent can help you work out what to do,” she explains, as someone might accidentally be doing something versus consciously not caring. “Ultimately, in a gym or fitness class situation, if someone is making you uncomfortable, you should report it.”

It shouldn’t fall on women to educate anyone on what is or isn’t appropriate. However, women also shouldn’t feel as though they can’t speak out. “In some instances, you might feel able to flag the issue directly to the person — maybe they’re completely unaware of what they’re doing!” It can be a polite conversation that gently points out the issue. “This can feel really intimidating, and it’ll certainly depend on the many safety issues women have to consider every day, so instead you might prefer to mention it to the class teacher or the gym owner — you could even do this over message or email,” she adds. In fact, if there are other men in the room, you may nod to them for support if you feel able. And if talking doesn’t feel like the answer, if there’s room to move, you may also decide that’s easier for your enjoyment of the class. If a man has put his yoga mat right next to you and you’re not comfortable saying anything, move to a different space for your peace of mind. If he moves with you, then there’s a clear issue to report that others will likely have seen. “Know that you have a right to speak up — it’s not you ‘making a fuss’ or ‘creating a problem’ — you’re allowed to say when something isn’t right and expect to see change,” says Hooton.  

We also know that sometimes when women report things, nothing gets done. And look, it’s never admirable to be petty and passive aggressive, so sometimes you might be tempted to take a leaf out of the book of the man bothering you... If they’re overextending in poses and putting their feet, for example, in your mat space, we wouldn’t judge if you returned the favour with an apologetic smile. Sometimes people take the hint through subtle retaliations. As Hooton says, they may not have even realised they were infringing upon your experience and that moment of embarrassment may make them back off. 

It’s a good thing we’re all diversifying our fitness routines — but that doesn’t mean you have to tolerate everything that comes into your space.