This Viral Vibrator Promised Me An Epic Pounding — & It Nailed It

My best friend likes to joke that in every successful relationship there must be one person who's a pro at putting together Ikea furniture and someone who is there for moral support. I am decidedly the latter. So, when I was offered the chance to try out the Love Hamma, a hammer-shaped, thrusting G-spot vibrator climbing up the search engine charts, I was terrified. I've never been a tool-toting queer girl, so the idea of putting a vibrating hammer anywhere near my vagina seemed extremely nerve-wracking. How did this toy work? What were people obsessing about? What exactly was this hammer going to hammer (my clit is not as durable as a nail, you know). But its description promised me a toe-curling combination of G-spot stimulation with a clit-focused head that could rival a powerful wand. Ultimately, my curiosity got the best of me. I needed to know what it would be like to get pounded by this internet sensation.

Upon its arrival, I reeled back. The Love Hamma was as large as the functional hammer sitting in my girlfriend’s toolbox and just as heavy. This thing has heft. Honestly, if given the opportunity, I bet it could physically nail a hammer into a wall. Most of the weight is located in the Hamma's girthy handle, which has a motor that powers not only three vibrating speeds but also a thrusting function. My fear compounded as I tested the functions against my hand. It felt huge. Maybe it was my unfamiliarity with using tools in general (or maybe it had been a little too long since I had a dildo as wide as my forearm in my hand!), but my initial nerves spun out into full-blown fear.

My fear was short-lived, though. As I explored more of my new power tool, I became more comfortable. Was it possible I was a tool person? Though I studiously avoided the handle as I putzed around with the settings, I soon concluded that the hammer's head was genius. Powered by a separate motor (that boasts up to 21 functions), the hammerhead acts as a two-for-one clitoral stimulator, offering vibrations at both ends (in what my Google search tells me are supposed to be the "face" and the "claw"). In layman's terms: one half is flat, to be used like your favorite wand, and the other half is curved and split like bunny ears, to perfectly surround and tickle your clit. Feeling emboldened, I grabbed a bottle of lube and decided to face my fears. Boy, am I glad I did.

The hammerhead is everything it promises to be and more. Though the tool is definitely heavy, I was still able to swap back and forth between the flat face and eared claws with ease. The dual sensations were exactly what I needed to warm up — more powerful than my normal clitoral stimulators but not quite as buzzy as my wands. The more I played, the more comfortable I got, and I decided to hell with my hesitancy — it was time to get pounded.

The insertable handle was just as big between my legs as I feared, but with the help of a dollop of lube and its surprisingly intense vibrations, I was able to slowly but surely get the whole thing up there. And let me first say "wow." Now, I'm not unfamiliar with G-spot vibrators (in fact I reviewed one from Hot Octopuss a few weeks ago!), but the motor in the Hamma is unlike anything I've used before. It is strong. It was the first time where I thought to myself: I am getting fucked by a hammer, and I love it. Despite being in the throes of my delight, I remembered the thrusting capacity, which increased the enjoyable sensation of being stretched to my ultimate limit. And though the thrusting handle can't replace the real thing, it did come awfully close. By the time my orgasm was finished, my power tool fear was not only eradicated, but I also felt handy. Like, if I could hammer my vagina, I could build anything. Maybe next time I'll see if I can construct multiple orgasms. Consider me a power tool convert. So, what are you waiting for? Throw on your tool belt and grab yourself a Love Hamma.