I Got My Dream Job, Despite My Imposter Syndrome

Illustrated by EUTALIA DE LA PAZ.

In our series Salary Stories, women with long-term career experience open up about the most intimate details of their jobs: compensation. It’s an honest look at how real people navigate the complicated world of negotiating, raises, promotions and job loss, with the hope it will give young people more insight into how to advocate for themselves — and maybe take a few risks along the way.

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Ed. note: All dollar figures in this story noted in CAD.

Age: 29
Location: Toronto
Current industry and job title: Television, senior branded content producer
Current salary: $101,050 (salary) + $2,000 to $4,000 (freelance income)
Number of years employed since school or university: Seven
Starting salary: $13/hour

Biggest salary jump: From $62,000 to $98,000, when I moved from my old TV show to a new show with a competing network.

Biggest salary drop: Right out of school I worked at a media startup, making $13 an hour. I left for a role at another startup, a print and digital magazine, where I made $2,000 a month as an independent contractor. This was a slight pay cut but also a much lighter workload, so I had the flexibility to take on other freelance work.

But the flexibility was not worth the stress of not knowing when I would be paid, which was somewhat irregularly through a wire transfer. And there was nothing taken off for income tax, so I had to do that myself. If all of this sounds sketchy, that’s because it was. I got out of there as soon as I could.

Biggest negotiation regret: When I applied to my first big job in TV, my imposter syndrome was so extreme that I was shocked I even got an interview, even though I was extremely qualified as the job required a very unique skill set. I was thrilled to get the offer, which was such an extreme jump from my previous salary that I didn’t even try to negotiate as I was convinced I would be let go for incompetence within the first three months.

I ended up excelling in the role but since I was hired in 2019, the following year didn’t provide the economic climate for raises of any kind. Had I had more confidence in my skill set, I could have been making at least $5,000 to $8,000 more for each of the three or so years I worked with the company. I essentially lost more than $15,000 by not believing in myself.

Best salary advice: Women need to go through salary negotiations with the confidence of a mediocre white man. If you have one in your life, before your next promotion or interview, run your salary expectations by them and you will marvel at the number they think you should ask for instead.

What I have learned is to always ask for a higher number than you’d accept — if you tell them your real number, you’re taking money out of your own pocket. And if they give you a number, always counter! It is never the last number, I promise you that. If more money is not an option, you can absolutely negotiate for more paid time off, vacation days, etc.